!J8wKEZOcc2 12/23/10(Thu)11:17 No.22111808|
To Whomever Finds This Letter,
I can't take it anymore. I was once like any other pony. I had friends, I liked my job and I had self respect. But that all changed the day Twilight Sparkle came to town. At her welcome party I was joking around and made a stupid face, just as someone took a picture.
Just one stupid face. I didn't even realize it until after the whole "forever night" thing. Then the picture was spread all over the place and people laughed about it. I laughed too, at first. I figured it would all go away. But then somepony put it on 4chan and everyone started calling me "Derpy." I still tried to ignore it, but soon everyone was doing it.
Before, some ponies would remember my name and say hi and others wouldn't pay attention. That's normal for a mailpony. But now no matter where I go everyone's saying, "Hiya Derpy!" in a stupid voice, or I even hear foals laughing, "Look mommy, it's that silly Derpy!"
Then the mean pictures started. My boyfriend dumped me because he was too embarrassed. Except for work I didn't leave my house anymore. My friends tried to help, but eventually they gave up. Later I found out they were calling me "Derpy" now too.
Funny, even though it all started after Twilight Sparkle got here, she's the only ones who don't call me Derpy. She just says "hi" and stuff, but she probably doesn't know my real name either. It's not like she ever get mail. (Someday we'll all be replaced by baby dragons, I suppose.) She seems nicer. I wish I could talk to her but maybe she doesn't know and she'd laugh at me too.
I can't go on like this. So I rolled around in cake and bacon and I'm going to the Everfree Forest wearing a skirt that says PURINA MANTICORE CHOW.
I don't know if anyone will find this letter because you won't have me to deliver it anymore.
GOODBYE CRUEL EQUESTRIA!