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You don't have to be a doctor to save lives.
Just donate blood.
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A few nights ago, I held an impromptu, livestreamed PMQ/Q&A session.
You can find it here (and be sure to subscribe!). For a list of questions answered/discussed, go here.

This Q&A was quite a bit different because I gave live audio responses to questions posted in the thread. The goal was to answer more questions, more quickly, and not skip over questions that would require a long written response. It had a few kinks but worked pretty well, and it's likely I'll switch to this format for future Q&A's.


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Old Thread
>>13409185

Rarity decided to make dresses for her friend, but when they start complaining, Rarity let them decide how it should look. Which dress, both the good one and the bad ones, did you like the most? Did you love her song during her endeavor of making a pleasant dress?
>>
RARITY A SHIT
>>
>>13414419
That song was the shit.
>>
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>>
Dash's was the best one
>>
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>>13414419
I LIKED RAINBOW DASH'S TURBOFAST DRESS
>>
>>13414436
Do you know what fixes ded? A good dicking.
>>
why do I get feels from you guys
>>
>>13414419
Twilight's original requests were adorable. Though she went overboard with TECHNICAL ACCURACY there's something classy about choosing a starfield.

Fluttershy's bird's nest was a war crime.

Applejack's GAHLOSIS? Oh god no
>>
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fluttershy is my waifu
>>
>>13414419
I liked the dress Rarity made for twilight's birthday the best.
Nothing else she has ever made even comes close.
>>
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>>13414419
Twiley's dress was the best of the good dresses, probably dash's was the best of the bad. Who didn't love art of the dress
>>
>>13414449
we're all feelsmiths inside
>>
>>13414450
you're my favorite writefag.
>>
>>13414464
Th-thanks Anon
>>
>>13414457
Dash's one was the only one that was decent from the bad ones
Good ones
Rarara>Dash>=Twily>Pinkie>FS=AJ
>>
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>>13414445
>>13414443
That looks way better than her new dress. Man, if I can remember, I would request an artist to draw that dress.
>>
>>13414448
You know what fixes good dicking? Good dicking!
>>
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>>13414448
>>
>>13414464
He's like the only writefag that isn't ded.
>>
>>13414486
Winning by default is still winning.
>>
>>13414450
>Fluttershy's bird's nest was a war crime.
I never understand why she would think its a good idea.
>>
>>13414486
What about Smanon?
>>
>>13414486
That's not true.We also have SmutAnon and I know that one of our drawfag regularly does greentexts in here as Anon if you want to consider that as writing
>>
>>13414486
Aspirant's still around
>>
>>13414514
I'm still alive if you count greentext as writing!
I even wrote a short thing the other day if you don't!
>>
>>13414517
are you sure?
I haven't seen him post in months
>>
>hope
>>
>>13414517
Didn't Broke ran him out for calling all this filly stories pedos?
>>
>>13414527
I'm pretty sure he wrote that Sweetie throws a surprise party for Rarity a week ago.
He seems to stay Anon
>>
>>13414514
Smutanon died earlier
>>
>>13414522
I like you too. You're a good feelsmith.
>>
It's good to have lots of active writers! I look forward to the hiatus turning out well after all.
>>
Why don't we have very many musicians here?
>>
>>13414561
music is for fags.
>>
>>13414561
I started to learn to play the lyre but I quit because >>13414566 is right

music is for fags
>>
>>13414561
Music takes too long to make
>>
fags
>>
>>13414538
woah woah woah
hold up, anon
I'm not trying to give anyone a case of the feels

I'm just trying to help anon embrace his inner slutty mare
>>
>>13414561
Music is really hard to make
>>
>>13414583
But I like the feels associated with that!
>>
>>13414514
who?
>>
>>13414583
Then maybe you can embrace our outer feel

:3
>>
>>13414574
>>13414584
Basically. I don't think it's really that we don't have musicians, we don't have composers.
>>
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>>13414587
oh, right on

>>13414601
what even
>>
>>13414496
I wouldn't say that
But I don't think you can "win" at writing
Some people go straight-up Asimov "info dump and Q&A", others go super-duper purple.
>>
>>13414603
That doesn't mean what we can't have any singers
It doesn't take any effort at all to sing a few lines.
>>
Maybe this could get some of our old writers back

I miss Metals
>>
>>13414630
I won a dubs request from metals one time
it turned into a fucking excellent story

I miss that guy

I hope he breaks out of prison soon
>>
>>13414630
Metals isn't coming back anon, he's in prison.
>>
>>13414630
Didn't he get out of Jail recently?
>>
>>13414506
She's got her idiosyncrasies.
>>
>>13414608
>>13414611
You're both really good at words.

And CropTool, I still have that email. The one with Lyra turning anon into a pony. I think that was my first step towards coming up with a true OC.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-LekuvF1T4
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqVVtaWd8Pw

Who the FUCK thought this was a good idea?
>>
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Have you done your part against bullying today?
>>
>>13414599
I don't think he wants everyone to know
>>
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>>13414656
Yes
>>
I'm not sure how to say this
I kind of like Button's Mom
>>
>>13414664
what kind of greentexts is it?
>>
>>13414646
I haven't forgotten it either

Every once in a while I look at the file, try to figure out what the hell I'm doing and quit because I really have no idea

it's such a cute idea, I really want to make it work!
>>
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>>13414656
>implying that facts are insults
>>
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>>13414676
lewd greentexts
>>
>>13414644
There was a guy claiming to be metals a month back or so. I think he said he moved states.
>>
>>13414682
Applejack isn't useless, she's just boring.
>>
>>13414675
she's very pretty, I don't blame you
>>
>>13414683

I think I know who it is
>>
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I thought Fluttershy knew way more about fashion the way she was talking. In what way is this acceptable?
>>
>>13414654
I think the thing I find the most fucked about this is how well it's done. I found this back by accident and as soon as it turned grimdark I went to the hit, but foozgooz's song and that animation kept me hooked
>>
>>13414692
She knows how to sew. I think she just went overboard from here.
>>
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>>13414690
I have my suspicions
>>
>>13414654
I don't really get what's supposed to be so bad about that
>>
>>13414676
The one I caught him with was smut because I recognized his writing style but I think there's also a bunch of >feels stuff from him.
>>
>>13414682
how the heck is bon bon going to steer that thing?
>>
>>13414656
>slut

this has to be a joke because no one else should be in on rarity being a slut
>>
>>13414688
there are a lot of pretty things

that doesn't mean that they're good. it means you're shallow. i hope a qt 3.14 fluffy autism vore machine shows up to your door and rapes you while you fawn over it.
>>
>>13414705
With her mouth.
>>
>>13414679
Maybe ditch the crystals entirely and replace them with something like having the hardware get pushed out by the magic, since it's not needed anymore? It seemed you wanted to use anon being in pain for something, but having crystals growing out of your back is kinda awkward.
>>
>>13414708
anon pls repeat after me
"it's okay to like things"
>>
>>13414692
She doesn't
At all.
There was this Anon who explained why her rant was 95% bullshit that didn't make sense or would have made the dress even worse.
Out of all the things she said only one was a legitimate complaint.
I wish I had screancaped it
>>
>>13414718
No, it's not okay to like things.
It's okay to not like things though.
It's even better to dislike things.
>>
>>13414699

That's the one.
>>
>>13414672
You sleep almost unbroken from five to six the next morning. There aren't any real dreams, just maybe the sounds of ponies entering and exiting the observation suite. Nice warm sheets, a nice dark place.

You awake in fits and starts. A cramp has gone off in one leg. Shit shit SHIT that hurts.

That kind of crazy "electric crabs nabbing your toes" cramp from your fourth toe up your leg. The best you can do is bite the pillow.

Naturally that's when the overnight monitor decides to open the mic and ask, "What's wrong? Are you in pain?"

This is not the best way to start the first day of your new life.

It's still throbbing pretty good. You're pretty sure you can say something without clenching your teeth.

What do you want to do, MLPG?
>>
>>13414744
I want to masturbate.
>>
>>13414722
>I wish I had screancaped it

I remember that. Fluttershy only had surface information on fashion. Fluttershy was playing the manager who read a magazine. She was only enough into fashion to have no idea what she was talking about, which is especially infuriating for someone who is into something

I can't think of a really great example for this myself, but if you play Dota or Lol you should have an idea of what I'm talking about
>>
>>13414730
it would be funny if we made up a new rumor to shift all the heat to a different contributor
or we could just blame everything on tofu
>>
>>13414744
Might as well get out of bed and try to stretch that damn thing out. "Just a muscle cramp. Happens sometimes. Should go away on its own."
>>
When did MLPG turn into AIE? This sucks.
>>
>>13414761
Hit "hide reply, make stub"
>>
>>13414744
masturbate self in to wakefulness, like every morning
>>
>>13414754
oh, fuck, i got it.

>I really like movies a lot, and consider myself pretty intelligent. I know a lot about movies so I only watch the good ones

>Favourites: Grown Ups 2. Transformers.
>>
>>13414744
Masturbate furiously while thinking of buttons mom swallowing you whole
>>
>>13414761
>fanfics_anon_adopts_a_new_strategy.jpg
>>
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>>13414761
>>
>>13414778
>this strategy
>new
>>
>>13414768
Or better yet just filter chistery.
>>
>>13414769
>>13414775
With a muscle cramp that feels like your toe's getting torn off? Fucking hell, guys.
>>
>>13414778
Maybe fanfic Anon is also linker Anon
>>
>>13414761
aie?
>>
>>13414786
Imagine that she bit you toe off.

It adds to the realism.
>>
>>13414786
power through it
don't be a pussy
>>
>>13414791
Anon in Equestria
>>
I think my pony is defective.
>>
>>13414791
aieou

aieou aieou
>>
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>>13414793
>>13414794
>>
>>13414730
Well, thats not who I was talking about but I kinda have the feeling that he's writing smut, too.
>>
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>>13414800
>>
>>13414798
oh, in that case, I'd say Tex is the one to blame for ushering us into that nonsense.

Yes I know that's specifically a thing, by aspirant i think, but Tex was def the one who let the other fags know that most of us were more than ok with their self inserts fucking ponies
>>
>>13414775
>Button's mother ate his father
>you've been so helpful she's pretty much hired you as a full time babysitter
>but you're more than that now, you're starting to be a part of the family
>She isn't exactly in the market for a new husband though
>hope you don't mind being Button's "older brother"
>>
>>13414800
And sometimes y
>>
>>13414755
>>13414810

Can you link me to his secret fimfiction account he only shared with his skype friends?
>>
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>>13414819
no
never y
>>
>>13414829
I thought it was a secret tumblr

but no, was never close enough to get the memo. Didn't he delete it anyway?
>>
>>13414830
Are you sure?
What about w?
>>
>>13414419
I find it odd how its not mentioned how Rarity did this for FUCKING FREE

FREE

ALL OF THOSE DRESSES

FOR FREE

AND THEY HAD THE FUCKING NERVE NOT TO LIKE THEM

WHAT THE FUCK

MY AUTISM IS GOING OFF
>>
>>13414841
>Make sure that it stays within our budgets
>>
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>>13414838
now you're just being silly
>>
>>13414744
I've been here from the start, and I want to know how this ends, but I have to sleep. Mind capping to repost later when you're done?

Don't fuck it up, guys.
>>
>>13414698
But still this mouthful:

>All right! Since you really wanna know... [inhales] The armscye's tight, the middy collar doesn't go with the shawl lapel, the hems are clearly machine-stitched, the pleats are uneven, the fabric looks like toile, you used a backstitch here when it clearly called for a topstitch or maybe a traditional blanket stitch, and the overdesign is reminiscent of prêt-à-porter and not true French haute couture. [pauses] But, uh... you know... um, whatever you want to do is fine.

I have no idea what she's talking about with the haute couture etc but that was an appalling end result for that speech
>>
>>13414849
Someone's being silly? I know what'll fix that.
a good dicking.
>>
>>13414751
You think of saying something pithy about needing to 'bate it, and your balls are filling your leg with poison. Surely that would give you a designated 30-minute "Privacy Time."

You think better of it. The time you joked about masturbation it took weeks to convince them, no, your palms don't really get hairy.

>>13414758
Climbing out of bed is a balancing act - you can't really even flex it without sharper pain. You manage to swing it to the floor and peg-leg it to the chair. You wave at the pane dismissively, "Just a muscle cramp. Happens some times. They go away on their own."

You milk the muscle from your thigh down to the calf, flexing your foot around manually. The researchers seem to be interested in the exercise. At least one is making furious notes.

"We used to call them Charlie Horses back in grade school."

The note-taking intensifies. You roll your eyes. Maybe you'll be less interesting once you get brain washed.

You look at the clock. It's 6:25. Four and a half hours until "zero hour," about an hour before breakfast. You're not feeling much of anything. Even the stinging is going away, through your sole still feels a bit electric.

You look to your desk. There seems to be a letter with your name on it in some pretty high-end gold ink.

You look around the room. Who would ever dare be in here without a rad suit, especially while he was sleeping? The letter is very clearly nowhere near the door slot or your document drawer. It's even propped up with a little brook stone.

Do you ask the staff? Call the bomb squad? Figure there are worse ways to die?
>>
>>13414842
W is a vowel in my language you double niggwr
>>
>>13414841
She asked for their opinions.
>>
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>>13414863
>>
>>13414836
He shared it with a few friends and told them not to post it anywhere.
It ended up here a few hours later.
He stopped talking to anyone after that and he hasn't updated his normal tumblr since then.
He has trust issues because of that. He refuses to talk to anyone, because it could have been anyone ho his friends to abuse his trust
>>
>>13414866
What the hell, open it. There's worse ways to die.
>>
>>13414862
There's been some pretty fierce debate. Depending on who's asking Fluttershy may have been off her ass.
>>
>>13414862
>but that was an appalling end result for that speech
Rarity is a bitch that couldn't take criticism is what happened there, anon.
>>
>>13414873
I will put my dick in you.
>>
>>13414842
Watch the part at the begining. It's made clear it's for free.
Otherwise Twilight wouldn't say that she doesn't need to do this, she wouldn't force AJ to get a dress when she doesn't have money to buy a simple plow and so on.
>>
>>13414862
Fluttershy said those on the spot when Rarity force Fluttershy into that position.
>>
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>>13414890
do it, faggot
>>
>>13414866
Eat it.
>>
>>13414890
Pinkie wraps her prehensile clitoral hood around your penis and rips it off as a sacrifice to the elder gods

Your soul has been spared
>>
>>13414894
if it's for free then why do all her friends care about keeping it within budget?
>>
>>13414902
you a shit
>>
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neigh
>>
>>13414915
>furseiseki

thanks for bringing back all the horrible memories
>>
>>13414905
It is now the time that I start serving the blood god.
I sacrifice Pinkie as a blood oath to the corrupted seven.
>>
>>13414866
Ask the science team if there was a breach in quarantine

Open the letter anyway
>>
>>13414910
It's part of the song, how should I know.
Also
>You need a glamorous new outfit for the Gala and I'll make it for you. No problem at all. It will be my pleasure!
> Oh, that's really sweet of you to offer, Rarity, but I can't let you do that. It would be so much work. This dress is fine.
>Twilight Sparkle. I insist on making you a new dress.
>Not another word! I won't take no for an answer.
>Well, in that case... Thank you for your generosity, Rarity
There is no possible ay for them to not be free.
>>
>>13414915
are you still raging
>>
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>>13414915
HEY RED
YOU TAKING COMMISSIONS?
>>
>>13414932
cadence, dress liked celestia, with chrysalis's horn, and ... an oc?

that is some fucking drawing
>>
>>13414920
Pinkie does not bleed. Pinkie does not die. Her undifferentiated marshmallow flesh reforms from each wound and neglects to suffer the heat of the strongest flames. Pinkie is eternal.

The pony hands you an invitation to rainbow dash's birthday party and leaves you bleeding the unholy ichors of the insane ones from the black spot above your scrotum where your dick once was.
>>
>>13414915
Hey Red I sent you a rec for a porn blog to follow in your inbox, did u see it?
>>
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>>13414942
>chrysalis's horn
what?
>>
>>13414913
Read it first, then eat it.
>>
>>13414951
i bet her dick is at least twice that size
>>
>>13414945
I then go to the party and sacrifice Rainbow Dash to the god of Change so he may rid Pinkie of her immortality.
I then rape Pinkie with an abortion rod. For the blood god, of course.
>>
>>13414951
crown. whoops
>>
>>13414960
raping someone with an abortion rod is obviously for the rapebortion god, anon. come on
>>
>>13414910
>>13414928
I always assumed Rarity was doing the work for free, but they still had to pay for the materials.
>>
>>13414968
There is no rapebortion god.
>>
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>>13414961
It's not really Chrysalis' crown either
I guess it's not exactly Cadence's but it's pretty close
>>
>>13414960
Rainbow Dash is not at the party. Only another Pinkie Pie coated in rainbow paints.

You look to yourself and realize that you too are among the pink ones, and so is everyone else.
>>
>>13414975
and that's why abortion be illegal even in cases of rape
>>
>>13414975
sounds like someone just invented the next hot OC princess
>>
>>13414902
Out of curiosity you gum the paper. Maybe if it tastes like poison you really should get them to stop taking notes and call Security.

It only occurs to you after putting a corner between your lips that's a really, really bad idea.

Fortunately it doesn't taste like anything. Maybe paper. Not much to it. It smells a little bit like lilacs. Lilac perfume.

Portia in the lab - the one who draws your blood - wears lilac perfume. This smells way more expensive.

>>13414923
You open your mouth to ask for a break in quarantine, then remember when Peaches tried to surprise you with candies for Hearts and Hooves day. You didn't get that back for a week.

Your hand reaches out and presses the privacy button instead. You mug needing to get more sleep and wave.. They don't seem to notice you over their notes about you.

>>13414876
You decide to open the letter. You were never labelled a psych risk, so you even have a letter-opener. No one really sends you letters, they just sit down in the booth and talk with you. Mostly you use it to open stubborn chips bags.

You slide it along the envelope. Either it's expensive or cheap here; it's very thick. You resort to tearing it with a finger. It's a mess but it'll do.

A finer stock of paper is inside, folded in thirds. Flipping it over you notice a set red seal - a radiating sun pattern of some kind. Shit, did the Smithsonian send you something HERE?

It does look kind of familiar. Your eyes dart around to some celeb magazines still laying on top of the book hutch. There's a very pretty white pony eating cake and looking ashamed of it. Wearing a crown.

You turn back to your bed. The Children's Book of Canterlot History has it 4" on the front. Jeez you feel like a dork.

Read the letter? Do the dinosaur?
>>
>>13414972
The budget line would make even less sense then.

I'll keep thinking they were free because of the dialogue
>>
>>13414990
oh my! A letter from the Princess!?
Of course we have to read it immediately!
>>
>>13414979
I ponder why I had a penis in the first place.
Then I sacrifice the building and village to the god of pointless destruction for the street cred.
>>
fun facts about pinkie pie:

pink isn't a real color, it's a color your brain invented to describe a mixture of frequencies that doesn't stimulate your green sensitive cone cells.
>>
>>13414990
A wax seal means important. Read it.
>>
>>13415005
The building, like all of the others in the village, is a giant distorted Pinkie Pie. It laughs at your futile sacrifice attempts and starts jiggling to liven up the party.

You are not grossed out in the least.
>>
Rarity did make the dresses for free.
It started for Twilight as a favor, instead of fixing a button on an old dress.
Then Rarity finds out Applejack wasn't going to go to the galloping galla with a dress, just her work attire.

Do you fuckers even watch the show?
>>
>>13414990
>Out of curiosity you gum the paper. Maybe if it tastes like poison you really should get them to stop taking notes and call Security.
>It only occurs to you after putting a corner between your lips that's a really, really bad idea.

I shouldn't have laughed this hard.
>>
>>13414990
Reading is for eggheads, throw it away.
Or at least convince someone else to read it for us.
>>
>>13415007
we perceive it as pink.
and of story.
>>
>>13415017
that's cool and all that you believe that, but I can't get past the "budget" line

why would they say it if everything were free?
>>
>>13415026
What if pony perceives it as green

What if pinkie pie's name is a joke
>>
>>13415017
>Applejack wasn't going to go to the galloping galla with a dress

this would have been really weird, despite them all never wearing clothes. was anyone just naked at the gala?
>>
>>13415017
No, do I look like a little girl?
>>13415035
Celestia was naked, wasn't she?
>>
>>13415032
>why would they say it if everything were free?

because every song is made up on the spot and a lot of the main cast suck at making up songs
>>
>>13415032
It was free.
Watch the episode
>>13415035
No
>>
>>13415032
There was still a budget for the cost of materials.
>>
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>>13415039
Celestia has never been naked on the show
>>
>>13415032
Because it's a shitty children's show
>>
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>>13414929
im hella mad
>>13414932
i have a lot to do
why?
>>
>>13415015
I find that, in a horrible twist of plots, killing a Pinkie, which is me, will kill all of the Pinkies. I also discover that Pinkie doesn't die simply because of the fact that she doesn't want to die.

So I commit suicide willingly. By repeated penetration with an abortion rod.
>>
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>>13415035
I've spotted a nudist, far left
>>
>>13415054
Rediv is mad?
I know what'll fix that!
>>
>>13415057
gasp!
>>
>>13415048
oh, I guess you're right. I forget sometimes that her tiara and stuff aren't physically attached to her body.
>>
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>>13415057

There were lots of them at the gala

Daisy and Colton were being quite lewd themselves
>>
>>13415065
for as bad as season three was with some things I like the idea that celestia is wearing a very powerful necklace. i've always been partial to the head canon that for whatever reason she can't use the elements any more. probably because the rest of her party died of old age
>>
>>13414457
What is Rarity doing with that bottle of glue?
>>
>>13415055
The metaphysical abortion is successful. You, as Pinkie Pie, are not born, so your mother, Pinkie Pie, does not die during childbirth.Doctor Pinkie Pie sighs in relief, and nurse Pinkie Pie helps Pinkie Pie to a recovery room while she cries over her lost child, Pinkie Pie.

A small gravestone is erected between the resting places of Pinkie Pie and Pinkie Pie.

The rapebortion god masturbates dispassionately.
>>
>>13415007
>>13415033
beige and lime don't exist either.
they aren't pure wavelengths.
they physically don't exist, but they exist in effect because we can perceive them, smartass.
saying that shit is like saying chords and music doesn't exist, because it is a mixture of different frequencies
>>
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>>13415075

She can't use them anymore because she explained herself that both her and her sister are no longer "connected" to them in Return of Harmony
>>
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>>
>>13415080
>implying that existing in your head matters

Sure, and rarity exists because she's next to me right now.
>>
what is your most shameful fetish
>>
>>13415085
Can I judge my friends based on their penis size or vaginal tightness?
>>
>>13415093
pony!
>>
>>13415088
are you implying that you never saw pink ever in your life until you consciously told yourself it exists?
>>
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>>13415093

jellies
>>
>>13415094
if you have friends that are willing to let you take measurements, then sure
>>
>>13415084
>both her and her sister are no longer "connected" to them

what's this about starswirl not being able to use them then? did they not want to use them were they not able to use them then would they have preferred he use them?
>>
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>tfw you gradually improve at a skill
>>
>>13415079
I question why Pinkie would masturbate to herself getting aborted.
>>
>>13415093
Pinkie Pie
>>
>>13415109
FUCK THAT. I WANT TO BE THE EBST AT THE EVERYTHING RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
>>
>>13415076
I have no idea, it's just a cute image
>>
>>13415093
Corruption and inflation
>>
>>13415109
I don't know this feel.
I've always been perfect at everything.
>>
>>13415101
No, I'm saying I've seen rarity all my life and the idea that she could be fictional is utterly bewildering

I believe that lauren faust is a reptillian jew with mind reading powers
>>
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>>13415093
sergals in dresses
>>
>>13415123
>lauren faust is a reptillian jew with mind reading powers

It all makes sense now!
>>
>>13415109
yeah
>>
>>13415115
>>13415121
>Not feeling especially good about your skill because you remember all the time you spent practicing and refining it to get to where it is now
>>
>>13415128
It still doesn't explain why ponies are so sexy.
>>
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>>13415108

The only thing we know for certain is at one point, both Luna and Celestia could use the Elements, and at some point after Discord's first defeat, they no longer could. We know Celestia could use them at least up until She banished Nightmare Moon, so I think its reasonable to assume that the spat between the sisters is what finally disconnected them from the elements.

They didn't really go into any more detail than that, not yet at least
>>
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>>13415084
Hey FS
you claim to be an expert on background ponies, right?

Has this cute little pon appeared outside of the grand galloping gala or is she a Canterlot-only unicorn?
>>
>>13415138
>Luna: you can't use the elements on your own! You need each of the elements to activate their power!
>Celestia: I am the elements, bitch.
>>
>>13415147
That is a little cute strap on that pony.
>>
>>13415136
Yeah, I'm too lazy for that.
I just quit if I'm not instantly good at something.
>>
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>>13415127
Hey anon, it's a shame your sergalfriend isn't home tonight.

Maybe I could be your baby eating buddy?

Raine would never know
>>
>>13415162
too much shark, not enough fox or wolf or whatever the fuck sergals are
>>
>>13415162
u-unf
>>
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>>13415147

That little pone is native to Ponyville, and can be seen at the party in Call of the Cutie
>>
>>13415093
I don't have a fetish or kink
>>
>>13415173
>She wears the same saddle
fucking slut
>>
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>>13415173
Neat! Does she ever show up without a saddle?
I want to see her butt
>>
>>13415178
We discussed this

Saddles are derived from armor or something
>>
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>>13415185

Nope, she is part of the group I call the doppelgangers, she is always wearing the saddle

Same story with this pone
>>
>>13415109
>skill
>talent

Getta load of dis guy ovah here!
>>
>>13415193
Good, they are good pone.
Pone should always wear the saddle.
>>
>>13415127
Foxsharkwolfjew on the left is a qt
Has a nice butt
8/10 would give belly rubs
>>
>>13415187
Actually I could see leather saddles acting as light armour for mlp ponies
>>
>>13415200
>not my little mlp ponies
>>
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>>13415193
>the doppelgangers
just because they have a similar manecut doesn't mean they're all the same, alright
>>
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>>13415210

Thats what they want you to think, anon. The moment you turn your back, its going to be invasion of the pod ponies
>>
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>>13415198
belly rubs are a nice thing to talk about yes
>>
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>>13415217
how can you say such awful things about the pony you claim is your waifu?
>>
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>>13415227
>>
>>13415004
>>13415013
You always thought wax seals went on the envelope, not to fold the letter up. Maybe she was trying to keep a housemaid or someone from purloining a special-looking envelope?

You bring the letter-opener to the red wax. You're pretty sure there's some way to take it off without breaking it in two. With the tip of the blade you manage to free almost all of it, leaving a big red smudge behind. The paper is barely even gouged. This is a real accomplishment.

Then again, so is a Royal Letter. Setting the wax seal aside, you turn up the bedside lamp and climb in with the new prize.

There seems to be no salutation, only a line where someone may have begun a "D." You read on.
"-`

I have learned you have rendered the decision to undergo radical memory remediation. Few have acceded this beyond alteration or amelioration of traumatic events, and largely to regain their normal lives. Surely this was worth attention.

I admit to more than polite inquiry; The Health Minister has apprised me of your (a blot) duration at Bound Sapling Magic Research Center. I am ashamed to have only learned of you through an urgent security county meeting. It seems unnecessary to remind you of the events that would so alarm my public. I am further told that, had your goodwill tour continued, introductions would have been made during a Royal banquet in early June. It is no small wonder what could have been.

I wish Equestria had been kinder to you - and also for the children, mothers, fathers, and loved friends who died during the "Wandering Madness" as the papers say. I am often told "it couldn't be helped." Those were my remarks at the memorial ceremony. At the time I was certain your - (a blot) indefinite incarceration could not be avoided; a beloved monster who can only spread poison.

It is humbling and thrilling to know my loyal researchers can so rightly disagree."

It seems to go on.
>>
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>>13415231

Rose is majestic and pure and is not doppelganging pod pony
>>
>>13415231
>not a unicorn

That's just a slut with a trendy haircut , anon
>>
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>>13415242
She is though
>>
>>13415242
I wonder if the Flower Trio leave their hous during winter
>>
Oh no! You have been shrunk and teleported inside Milky Way's bra!
>>
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>>13415245
oh
that makes sense

I bet this hot little pony gets all the stallions with her pretty, silver wings
>>
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Barrel warning: notpone

Dwarf Fortress 2 is almost out, are you hyped yet?
>>
>>13415263
not again!
I wish she were more sensitive, last time it took ages for her to find me
>>
>>13415245

Besides I did not start calling them doppelgangers due to the unicorn mane cut, but rather due to the fact many of them are slight color shifts of regular background ponies that have all the mane styles

There is an off color colgate, carrot, cloud kicker, all of whom wear saddles and flowers
>>
>>13415263
Fuck that. You have been grown and teleported outside of canterlot's walls.
>>
>>13415274
Pony finds you and teleports you back to earth.
>>
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>>13415227
>Well, your body is not a map right now, so it should be alright
>The cardinal directions are not defined.
>>
>>13415279
Jokes on pony, equestria was on earth all along.
>>
>>13415265
>dwarf fortress 2
u wot
>>
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>not posting the best background pony
>>
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Trigger warning: wrong folder
>>
>>13415235
Might as well keep reading. Should probably get some paper and a quill of my own, if the urge to write an apology letter strikes me.
>>
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>>13415185

>spoilers

Hey anon, you will never guess what I found
>>
>>13415193
... your knowledge on background ponies - while utterly useless - is really impressive
>>
>>13415310
oh come on
it can't go just a little bit lower?
her mark
I want to see her mark
>>
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>he still isn't a pretty princess
>>
>>13415093
The stuff that Smanon writes. I constantly feel like Freud is breathing down my neck whenever I jerk off to it
>>
>>13415288
pony apologizes for her mistake and promises to send you home this time. pony teleports you to autism planet.

it is bright. you are likely to be eaten by a synx.
>>
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>>
It's like the humans of new york tumblog

Only instead of humans

its ponies

and instead of new york

its ponyville

Ponies of Ponyville

Get it
Got it
Good
>>
>>13415339
Fuck off Roogna.
>>
>>13415340
The shit is humans of new york?
>>
>>13415340
I don't get it at all but I'd like to follow it if it's going to have cute ponies in cute scenarios
>>
Why haven't you been drawing?
>>
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>>13415316

Unfortunately, you are denied anon. Its an error and in the very next scene she has her saddle back on

However Doppelgangers always have the cutie mark of the pony they have pod cloned, so that ponies cutie mark is almost certainly the same as Sparkler/Amethyst Star - a trio of cut gems

>>13415313

Thanks anon, I think!
>>
>>13415316
Woah there pervy pete, this is a christian imageboard!
>>
>>13415354
because I'm terrible at it and it's not fun
>>
>>13415349
>>13415351
http://www.humansofnewyork.com/
>>
>>13415354
Have no skill or talent
>>
>>13415360
That would actually be pretty sweet.
>>
>eating a muffin
>try not to pretend i'm a very ugly pony
>>
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>>13415331
[X] Pet synx
>>
>>13415375
>try not to cry
>cry a lot
>>
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>>13415382
>>
>>13415375
>at a party
>try to pretend that i have friends
>>
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>>13415356
>Minuette clone doesn't have an hourglass
>>
>>13415376
that's a goat retard
>>
>>13415376
too bad, it is actually a autism goat
>>
>>13415396
>implying not a hue shifted sparkler
>>
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>>13415359
>>13415365
That attitude = 0pone
You're better than that anon
>>
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>>13415400
oh, I just noticed how the mane is
you're right
my mistake
>>
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>>13415396

That is because she is not the cloning victim anon. Sparkler is

Her cutie mark however is everywhere
>>
>>13415354
I feel like it's been a chore and something akin to homework everytime i ask for requests, so I've decided to just not take requests anymore.
>>
>>13415411
Drawing won't make pone real.
>>
Bad things happen
>>
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>>13415376
the goat faints in fear

you have lost your only friend
>>
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>>13415386
>>
>>13415424
You don't know that
>>
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>>13414496
One day I won by default and they cut the prize: $150 instead of $300.
>>
>>13415433
you got ripped off, dude
>>
>>13415420
Then draw your own things. Nobodies forcing you to take requests
>>
>>13415426
>>13415398
>>13415397
Fuck
>>
>>13415439
What do you think I just said?
>>
>>13415447
WELCOME TO AUTISM PLANET

THEY HAVE WEIRD OC DESIGNS FOR EVERYTHING
>>
>>13415432
I tried drawing before and it didn't make pone real.
>>
>>13415447
goatfucking is morally reprehensible. as punishment, the tribunal of autism goats sentences you to a lifetime on the autism moon.
>>
>>13415093
I'm not ashamed of any of my fetishes and neither should You. Grow up.
>>
>>13415456
Maybe you have to get really good at it first
>>
>>13415463
Scat is pretty shameful
>>
>>13415470
Really? Prove it.

It's all just human prejudicions, it's not objective that <insert my favourite fetish here> is bad.
>>
>>13415456
>tfw no matter how often you draw her, she will never come to life
>>
>>13415464
WHAT?
THAT WASN'T PART OF THE DEAL
>>
>>13415456
It made pony real in my heart. That's all that matters
>>
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>>13415456

You have to draw with a quill to make pone real, everyone knows that
>>
>>13415480
Well, murder and guro are kind of objectively bad [for your partner9
>>
>>13415485
Well don't I feel like the April fool!
>>
>>13415482
Do it for her anon
>>
>>13415463
>>13415480
>sick fuck, n.
>someone who refuses to better themselves as a functional human being capable of a happy, healthy life because they would rather accept their flaws instead because they are lazy and fucking stupid

Enjoy dying from eating shit

Only accept fetishes that are harmless and don't keep you away from happiness. Even then, sometimes you should reject some fetishes anyways. Fetishes that remove you from society as a whole, like fursuiting.
>>
>>13415485
I didn't know that.
Why didn't you tell me this sooner?
>>
cuddling with rumble
>>
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>>13415497
>>
>>13415489
I doubt that.

They should just be better at ignoring shit they don't like.
>>
>>13415498
You never asked!
>>
>>13415497
Yeah? I'm quite sure I'm happier fapping to things I love than you, bitter and angry 24/7.

Try it once, just lose control.
>>
>>13415509
I've asked numerous times how to make pony real.
>>
>>13415485
But remember, she'll only come out as well as you can draw. You want her to be happy with the way she looks don't you?
>>
>>13415501
sooner or later one of us is going to get a boner
there's just no way around it
>>
>>13415497
>>13415516
You're fucking mixing up fapping to something and having intercourse.
>>
>>13415235
At the bottom of the page you realize it's one of two very thin sheets. You switch them; it's a bit hard to read with the translucence.

"My personal physicians have taken pains to overlook Researcher Peach Prong's blueprints and modified procedure. It was at the urging of my security advisors but I am regretful to say it had a personal dimension - "a shining smile but spreading doom" is something we teach our youngest foals to fear. One example was locked away in stone. You have the distinction of being very much alive, a clear health hazard in stone or flesh. You rock many with dread.

That fear was addressed by every member of your primary care staff. The theory is sound. The process is workable. Regardless of the outcome you will no longer be a threat; if anything we will be in your debt. You are risking your life even as to reclaim it, and setting an example for alike Cursed individuals.

This night I turned to my sister, who once twisted her powers to rule over with cruelty and tried yet again. She again is my closest friend and greatly loved. To my right I found a strange twisting shape -who once would have reveled at your misfortune- now teaching a child her abacus - "inventively".

I see daily such strong examples of redemption, neither facing the same peril you do now. I humbly request your presence at the Royal Palace pending your recovery.

I further request that in the case of (another small blot) unforeseen circumstance your possessions, correspondence and material be transferred to the Canterlot Library in permanence. If you should not be able to tell your story, someone must. Someone will.

I am not certain what to call you, sight unseen, but in your friendships I see clearly the work of a good person. I hope they grow strong beneath my Sun, long legs striding my land. I hope to soon call you a friend and Subject of the Realm.

I hope.

Signed,
Princess Celestia
Ruler of the Realm
Keeper of the Faith"

Thoughts?
>>
>>13415530
No one was talking about having intercourse
>>
>>13415506
Most of humanity doesn't like thing either, and they have a very good reason for it. Thing cuts your life short and reduces your ability to reciprocate, which is the entire moral point of your life. By liking thing, you are making life marginally worse for everyone else.

thing is mlpg
>>
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>>
>>13415522
I don't care, I just want to cuddle.
>>
Instead of drawing, how about writing?

National Writing Month is coming up?

How about a 50,000 novel of pony smut, hm?
>>
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I need another simple thing to draw for practice
>>
>>13415451
Since the post you quoted asked why you were drawing and you responded by saying you didn't want to do requests, it sounded like you were saying you weren't drawing at all because of it.
>>
>>13415533
>overlook
So they're ignoring it?
>>
>>13415561
In American English it can mean "review"
>>
>>13415522
Rumble won't stop talking about sergals and autism goats and the duct tape is too far away for you to reach without breaking the cuddle
>>
>>13415553
I'm terrible at writing, I hate it, I've nearly killed myself because of it.
>>
>>13415551
alright, but try not to frot him too hard
he's just a little colt, after all
>>
>>13415553
You might even do 5 million words of pony smut, it'll be equally as worthless.
1000000x0 is just as much as 5x0
>>
>>13415553
Writing is boring
>>
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>>13415561
Sorry I meant "review in depth."

Please have a koala.
>>
>>13415576
Wow
this guy really hates writing
>>
>>13415571
punch rumble in the face

he was a shitty pony anyways
>>
>>13415582
OH FUCK

DUDE KOALAS ARE VICIOUS

TAKE COVER
>>
>>13415571
What the fuck are autism goats?
>>
>>13415605
goats with autism.
>>
>>13415605
This guy just likes throwing around words he's seen in MLPG and it never makes any sense, don't bother.
>>
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>>13415577
Why would I want to do that?
>>
>>13415605
You're in a general dedicated to them.
>>
>>13415533
>"a shining smile but spreading doom" is something we teach our youngest foals to fear. One example was locked away in stone. You have the distinction of being very much alive, a clear health hazard in stone or flesh. You rock many with dread.

Parallels with Discord make my dick hard
>>
>>13415533
That's the end, right? I haven't been participating, but I have enjoyed following along. Thanks for writing!
I'm surprised no-one commented about you using the name Megan from the earlier gens
>>
>>13415616
I'll rediv contributor the piss out of your drawing unf watch the show you fucking brony ross filter chistery's waifu stallion sounding
>>
>>13415533
We have a pen and pad or something, right?

Dear Princess Celestia,

I suppose giving my name is rather pointless at this juncture, as I won't be having it for much longer. I am happy to donate my personal effects to your library, as I suspect they won't have much meaning to me once the process is complete. I look forward to meeting you, as a new (and hopefully better) person (or pony?).

Above all else, I must thank you for your concern. Your words provide great comfort, more than you can ever know.

Yours,
Anonymous
>>
>>13415616
its true
i don't know if sergal refers to a pony thing, an old lady, or a shark
>>
>>13415633
No, Anon still has surgery to get through. This is all just drawn-out jive to be honest.

I'm glad someone caught that
>>
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>>13415624

Pony is not goat anon

There is a clear difference

goat wears headset, pony does not
>>
>>13415648
I didn't call it out because I thought everyone would get the reference

I thought it was hilarious
>>
>>13415641
> filter chistery's waifu
Why would you filter Twilight?
Not that she's quite a waifu but she's my favrit pone
>>
>>13415651
Pony is much sexier than goat.
>>
>>13415651
What if goat is just pretending to be a pony?
>>
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>>13415651
that's exactly what they want you to think
>>
>>13415657
He, he want's to filter your waifu stallion
>>
>>13415645
Dear Anonymous

We have learned that no amount of magic can clean your mind and soul of an uncontrollable urge to rape, which has only come under control by means of your current personality. This procedure would prove disastrous for the populace of equestria.

Your friendly executioner, Princess Celestia.
>>
>>13415641
I laughed
>>
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>>13415660

Then goat is clearly up to something nefarious
>>
>>13415647
It's all three and mewball's penis.
>>
>>13415668
>want's
>He, he
Alright, I think it's time I get some sleep.
Goodnight MLPG>
>>
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>>13415669
She's gonna do it herself, right?
I wanna get decapitated by a sunbeam!
>>
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>>13415665
>>
>>13415657
Who's your second favorite pony?
>>
>>13415668
>your waifu stallion
IT'S CALLED A HORSEBANDO
HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO GO OVER THIS
>>
>>13415674
Maybe goat wants to free their sheep brethren
Over 1000 years ago they were kept in zoos by the Crystal ponies.
Now they are used by slaves by ponies and kept in zoos by crystal ponies.
>>
>>13415688
Depends. How many times have we had to go over the difference between a poniichan and a coltouto?
>>
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>>13415669
I get to choose the method, right?
>>
Can someone give me a tl;dr what Chisterys thing is about?
>>
>>13415677
Unf
>>
>>13415701
anon is a walking psychological disease that drives ponies into a sexual frenzy
>>
>>13415647
https://duckduckgo.com/?q=!e621+sergal
>>
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>>13415691

Pony has no idea what you are talking about anon
>>
>>13415679
I'd rather be fucked to death.
>>
>>13415641
>leth.exe encountered a critical failure
>>
>>13414603
I second that. Making music takes WAY to much time. and to do something pony related? No thank you.
>>
>>13415709
Bah. One day the Rams from the north will come to pillage the pony kingdom as vikings do. And then the sheep shall rise to help them. And so the goats
THEN PONY, MINOTAUR AND GRIFFONS SHALL BE THE SLAVES
>>
>>13415647
They're not an MLPG thing but from other boards
People only paid attention once Taski's picture was posted and people noted that they were sergals
and now you won't stop repeating the word
>>
>>13415706
Does it involve Celestia and Luna?
>>
>>13415733
Celestia's involvement is limited to a letter that just showed up
Luna isn't involved at all
>>
>>13415728
>Bah
get back in your cage
Who let you on the internet, anyway?
>>
>>13415701
What
>>13415706
said, but replace sexual with murderous, I think. I don't think it's been explicitly stated what happens, but bad stuff.
>>
>>13415706
I think I missed the sexual part.
>>
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>>13415728

Soon anon.

Soon.
>>
>>13415708
Oh, those things. I always thought those were funny pictures of dog people from /tg/.

Apparently they're furry BDSM porn instead.

unf
>>
>>13415697
>coltouto
>colt+imouto

what
>>
>>13415697
Are you sure you mean Coltouto?
>>
>>13415645
You pull out your parchment and quill and try your best penmanship. This may be your final letter, or your best in a while, and one of the few ever to Royalty for certain.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

I humbly suggest you just call me Anon but it's possible I won't remember it. I hope learning a new name is not jarring to you. I am glad to donate my personal effects to the library. Maybe Equestrians can learn from who I am - and who I will be. You should take possession in any case; I can't guarantee my effects will be much use to my future self.

It is gratifying to be called a person again in the wider world. I look forward to meeting you as a new and perhaps better one.

Above all else, thank you. You don't need to apologize. If anything your thoughts give me great comfort, maybe more than you know.

Yours Truly,
Anonymous"

You sign with only a minor flourish. The words seem to all go more or less the right way and the lines are pretty even. You fold it in thirds, stuff it in a plain envelope and simply address it "Princess Celestia, c/o Twisted Sapling Research Facility." You leave it in the dust-lined "OUTGOING MAIL" tray in your document shuttle and press it through the airlock. That will give the staff a jolt.

You feel sort of ... whole. You glance at the clock. It's 8:30 and small bowl of Furina and buttered toast is waiting at the door.

What do you do?
>>
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>>13415785
It's like a small ponetato!
>>
>>13415791
Break out of the containment zone and rape everyone
>>
>>13415701
It started as a drabble about four threads ago. No one's really told him to leave. I don't mind it.

It's that Anon and other humans somehow exert a strong magical force that puts ponies in a frenzy, especially if ponies are asleep in the field's sphere of influence. Every time Anon went from village to village it caused people to murder in gruesome ways.

He's living in a medical research facility with researchers who are confident he can be cured ... but only if his old memories go through a blender. No one's really certain what his outcome will be but they're telling him "don't expect to tie shoes or remember your name."
>>
>>13415791
Eat breakfast, say our final goodbyes and timeskip to the surgery
>>
>>13415645
Hey uh
I don't mean to rain on your parade
But typically people contribute like one line of dialogue or action or maybe a cut and thrust, not a few paragraphs.
>>
>>13415785
not imouto, otouto
>>
>>13415816
I've always wanted to write a letter to the Princess, alright?
lay off
>>
>>13415824
you sound like a kid writing a letter to "santa" that's cute
>>
>>13415829
yeah, maybe one day I'll write one "for real"
>>
>>13415810
And the head of research feels responsible for the last human to find Equestria dying under the knife. They got it terribly wrong.

It was Megan.

Generation One's Megan.
>>
>>13415816
Might be different for in-thread stuff I guess, but for conversation and letters in quests one Anon providing a fully-formed thing can be handy; it gets ideas going and anons that had ideas but were blocked by trying to come up with a way to get from the start of the conversation to it can then propose alterations.
>>
>>13415833
if you put so much as one word to parchment i will singlehandedly employ your children and exploit your people with high interest rates

don't cross me motherfucker
>>
>>13415834
Damn, this really seems like something I should have been paying attention to
>>
bɘb
>>
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where has marker pony been these past few days
>>
>>13415849
She's been on the lam ever since Linkboard pony got banned
>>
>>13415849
She's dead
>>
>>13415849
on vaycay

>>13415851
there's no linkboard pony
>>
>>13415849
she's been feeling a little down lately
she'll get out of it soon enough
>>
>>13415856
that's what they want you to think
just try and post the linkboard and see what happens
>>
>>13415849
Markerita has been at the beach with Gloomy and Sub Pone.
>>
>>13415856
Not anymore there isn't
>>
>>13415847
I think the start of it grew out of this Anon's concerns, if you want to follow it through.
>>13409814
>>
>>13415863
There's a sub pony?
>>
>>13415810
I'm not really feeling it, but I don't really care that it's going on.
>>
>>13415870
Yeah, she doesn't as much talk or art as the others, though. I've seen her called Junior and confusingly some people calling her Markerita, and she's a fan of adventure and questing since the quest board over there is one of the more active.
I wanted to post a picture of her, but I've yet to transfer my pony pictures to my new computer and Derpibooru doesn't have any of her that I can find quickly.
>>
>>13415901
http://images.4chan.org/mlp/src/1378636765318.png

the only picture I'm aware of is already up in the previous horse
>>
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No ponies here, captain.
>>
>>13415911
but Twily
you are a pony
>>
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>>13415916
Baaa
>>
>>13415916
Twily is too dumb of a pony to realize she is a pony
>>
>>13415807
At this point in Jurassic Park or the like like the monster breaks out of containment and spends a week getting chased by people with really good hair and terrible aim, falling in a volcano or something.

>>13415813
YOU just want to eat and get this day over with. The furina is orange rind and blueberries. It's not so bad for a last meal. It's not muesli but it goes down warm. The chef must have added just a bit more cream today.

You wash it down with the orange juice and savor the warm peaty tang of the rye and "volunteer" butter. It must be grass-fed.

You leaf back through "History of Canterlot." You don't even look at the clock. This morning is a strange thing alright.

You're enjoying the bit about the Merchant's Guild funnelling money to pirates along the eastern shore to keep tiger-pirates at bay when you hear a regular tapping at the pane. You reflexively touch the button before looking up.

Of course it's Peaches. He's putting on his bravest smile and offering the Equestria Daily AND the Canterlot times in either hoof, "Maybe you want a jump on the day?"

You just nod. The papers go in the document tray and come out in the usual way. You glance through the headlines. Something about a chimera getting loose again near Ponyville. Superfund requests all over again.

You chew your lip. You're glad to not be Celestia right now.

Peaches' voice peaks, "Did - did you address this letter properly?"

You look over the newspaper in what you hope is incredulity. "You really think I'd confuse addresses among my many singular snail-mail correspondences?

Peaches looks a little gobsmacked still, but starts walking to the mailroom.

You lift the paper again. By the time you reach the Finance section you can feel it's almost time. White coats are entering and exiting your peripheral vision with increasing frequency.

You see the Crime Today section and notice a headline about you -

And you hear a tap at the glass. "Anon? It's time."
>>
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>>13415931

Behold, an elite goat infiltration specialist
>>
>>13415944
let's rock
>>
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>>13415946
what's his salary?
>>
>>13415966
I wonder if changelings ever fight for their queen's attention
>>
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>>13415966

More than bugpones make I am sure


Also changelings sure are happy for being generic evil minions

They must be the most well treated henchmen in comic villain history
>>
>>13415944
I would rather tell them to wait for a minute or two so we can read that last bit. Either that, or pocket it for later.
>>
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>>13415984
She's just trying to drown out the fact that no one ever ships her with anyone.
>>
>>13415985
why bother reading it now
it's not like we're gonna remember it

We can just ask for them to give us the book after the treatment
>>
>>13416024
She gets shipped with Shining Armor in that Hyperspace Hyperwars thread.
>>
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>>13416024

She has an endless supply of huggable minions

She is probably in no rush
>>
I had the most amazing fap to my least favorite mane6 pony

I don't want to become a rarifag pls help
>>
>>13416045
fap to all the other mane ponies to balance it out
then fap to background/secondaries for a week
>>
>>13415944
You put down the newspaper with a start. Juniper is standing there, looking for all the world a grandmother nervous to see a child on a stage. She's dressed in what you know to be her 'special' turtleneck.

>>13415985
You hold up one finger, folding the article back in her direction. She gives a little nod and says something into the Security telephone. You look at the clock. It's still 10:47. There's some buffer time.

The article is not very deep. It's set off to the side by a secondary reporter culling mostly from the press release the team made up yesterday. It's bare-bones; "Anon the Human of far-off Earth is seeking reparative aid to his Aberrative Curse under guidance of the staff of Twisted Sapling in suburban Canterlot. Researchers are confident that it will remove the curse though finer prognosis was not revealed to this newspaper as of the date of publication. A public representative for the thaumaturgical research concern simply cited medical confidentiality rules."

You figure that's fair enough, though your thumb slips and a CONTINUED section reveals itself. A tiny marginalia, "Anonymous has always maintained both remorse and innocence. In Cursed individuals these are not mutually exclusive. A trial in absentia found --"

You put the paper down. You know what 'unfit for public exposure' meant. Talk about padding.

You tap lightly on the glass to Juniper and give a thumbs up. You watch her pick up the Security telephone. You can lip read "He's ready."

You get up and dust yourself off, pulling a nasty crease out of the scrub shirt.

The telltale sound of HAZMAT boots echo in the hall. You come respectfully close to the door.
>>
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>>13416045
>rarity
>least favorite pony
I hope your favorite pony doesn't get hugged for a day
>>
>>13416063
Hold out your hands to be cuffed and go peacefully.
>>
>>13415994
Watch the video, too, that sheep is really cute
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D02F9HeSQbg

Why won't you play with her, bull?
>>
>>13416065
wow
rude
that just makes me want to hug his favorite pony even though I don't know which one it is

I would hug rarara too, I guess
I wouldn't want her to feel left out
>>
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>>13416065
>>
which pony has dumps like a truck
>>
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I wish ponies were this size.
I wish for cute little lap sharks
>>
>>13416128
The one that shits on you and kills you in the process.
>>
>>13416128
truck?

truck
>>
>>13416146
guys like what
>>
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Meanwhile in other parts of the internet...
>>
>>13416063
It opens with a lurch. The hinges are oiled every week but lack of use still made it squeal.

You look down at two stout stallions in bright orange HAZMAT suits. One stands a little farther back, indicating with a forehoof you should walk to the left.

>>13416102
Reflexively you kneel down and let the Earth stallion clasp minor restraints around your arms. They're some sort of duri-plastic. You even have some slack to hold your arms comfortably.

You start off to the left as suggested. It's easier said than done. You always have trouble walking alongside others from lack of practice, especially those who could get literally underfoot. The hallway seems to stretch on forever. Every table and desk seem far too small for a hospital, then every fifth step you remind yourself what species you are.

You look up. The ceilings must be at least 18' high. Maybe you're one of the lucky ones.

You follow gentle prompting to what you recognize as the medical labs. Silly images of band-aids, smiley faces, and monkeys with hypodermic needles and the phrase "I've practiced this on hundreds of grapefruits!" adorn the walls of the labs.

This is familiar enough. The two squat men in orange ask you to take another left. A smaller corridor lies that way. It smells strongly of camphor, Barbasol and something like burning tin.

Do you go?
>>
>>13416166
do you think we could get one last pony hug in, or would our very presence drive them to madness?
>>
>>13416166
Yeah, but try to whisper naughty nothings to the two officers.
>>
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ugh, I wanna go back to sleep.
Fuck.

Well. Good morning mlpg.
>>
>>13416108
neat
I think real sheep are cuter than real ponies
>>
>>13416183
good morning friend
>>
>>13416183
Twilight you're already behind schedule with the books you have to read
GET OUT OF BED FASTER
>>
>>13416183
once more
and this time with feeling
>>
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>>13416045
she just wants to cuddle
>>
>>13416191
Wooly animals are pretty cute
>>
>>13416212
her hair looks like a big purple dick in the thumbnail.
>>
>>13416045
>Not fapping to your non-favourite pones
I don't find her as sexually attractive as her friends
>>
>>13416183
>>13416192
Blog updated
>>
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>>13416193
>>
>>13416225
It really doesn't
>>
>>13416177
You take a look at the burly stallions. You'd like a hug, but you remember something about "never touch the Officers, they're trained to respond to all possible threats as actionable threats."

It's a little disconcerting to see rippling muscles through what should be a baggy HAZMAT suit.

Maybe hugs can wait.

>>13416182
The hallway is a little darker. You recognize a ceramic form of the periwinkle daisy extract that shields your quarters. Maybe an older form or - you consider - a stronger one.

The officers are in no especial hurry. You see no turns up ahead. Taking the chance, you bend down low and stage-whisper, "So, I must know before I'm forced to forget - is it true what they say about big suits? Big ... hooves?"

The older officer simply keeps walking. The younger one gives you a brief smile over his shoulder.

Shortly after you find yourself at a pair of double doors. The sign simply reads SURGICAL THEATER. A smaller engraving seems to be --

A children's drawing. With what to human eyes is clearly a human figure and an attempt at a pony.

The officers follow your eyes but say nothing. The older stallion pushes open one of the doors and looks at you not unkindly.

Do you step through?
>>
>>13416260
I'm coming into this with little context, but this story seems very depressing
>>
>>13416260
Enter and start ranting about 'it always being lupus.'
>>
it's so cold
I could go for a nice warm pone right about now...
>>
>>13416260
Step through
Look for an opening to grab a handful of ponynuts
>>
>>13416291
There's no pone, so I suppose a bit of good dicking would solve that, wouldn't it?
>>
>>13416297
a pone dicking would be so warm
>>
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>>13416277
It's supposed to be.

You're fluffy human.
>>
>>13416347
you're not a fluffy human, you're just a hellish demon that spreads and evil plague
>>
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>>13416362
>>
>>13416307
a dicking from a little pony?
>>
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>>13416307
and soft
>>
>>13416138
Fucking vorefags
>>
>>13416362
Just like an actual human
>>
>>13416383
it would especially be dump with that pon
>>
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>>13416407
dump...?
>>
>>13416414
ponka no
>>
>>13416416
I called the pone shit.
>>
>>13416394
Misanthropist pls

Humans aren't that bad

Except when they chop up pone for steak, eat fillies for snacks, and wage war for the hell of it.
>>
>>13416282
>>13416294
You walk in as proudly as you can, hoping to catch Peaches before this all begins. Hoping to draw his attention, you raise your voice and arms best you can and say, "LUPUS LUPUS LUPUS, all you Doctors ever say is that it's Lupus-"

You become aware of your surroundings. It's a rotunda with high vaulted walls and the curtains drawn terribly tight. You can't see daylight.

You do however see a man-sized chair and at least eight banks of heavy-metal-looking equipment feeding thick cables into its base. It's lit by some bright surgical lights. A silvery set of panels hang at odd angles just above the head rest.

Everything reeks of antiseptic and static discharge. The joke dies in your throat even without the help of the technicians casting you odd looks.

Peaches appears at your side, wrapped in lighter surgical robes and an amulet glowing fiercely, wicking away your Curse. It's always strange to see him so ... short. Sitting really makes all men equal. "It's a little intimidating?"

You nod a little dumbly.

"It's okay, I put half of it together blind drunk. It can't be that hard."

You recoil visibly.

He roars with laughter. It sounds so much better without a speaker. Even the taunting, "Oh come on, I have your back. Remember, haunt me like a bro."

You catch his eye dart at another engraving of a child's drawing. You nod and smile. Without a word you walk toward the light.

The restraints slip off after an assistant passes a box cutter over it. You use your free hands to climb on the chair. It's sort of S- shaped like a dentist's but pretty poorly padded. Not used to human asses, you guess.

You climb in position and sit your head on the curved rest for your neck. At least they must have gotten your proportions down.

Many utensils glitter on trays to either side. You recognize one for injecting adrenaline in a heart, another for cutting open a chest cavity.

You try to catch Peache's eye but he's busy.

What do
>>
>>13416416
I'm not a skat fetishest, but the thought of a pone having just taken a huge dump is pretty sexy to me. I just like girls being relaxed/relieved in general.
>>
>>13416436
yeah, but that almost never happens
so humans are fine!
>>
>>13416442
How would anyone not panic in this situation
>>
>>13416442
> "It's okay, I put half of it together blind drunk. It can't be that hard."
>>
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>>13416449
Almost never!

Hey anon, are you hungry?
>>
>>13416451
>magitech.txt
>>
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Why aren't you masturbating?
>>
>>13416436
human is not sargel
>>
>>13416464
Horse meat is delicious.
Honestly.
>no place near me sales it
Life is suffering.
>>
>>13416474
is horse anything like deer?
I love me some deer meat but I've never had horse
>>
>>13416471
Because I still don't have anything worth masturbating to
>>
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>>13416474
>>13416464
>>13416449
>humans
>>
>>13416471
because you stopped dancing for me
>>
>>13416442
Ask about the odds of going terribly wrong, and then about the chances of finding a cute mare after the operation
>>
>>13416471
I'm rebuilding my cookie empire and I'm bored with all my pornography

there's not really anything new that panders to my kinks
>>
>>13416487
How many heavenly chips?
>>
>>13416471
I have a terrible cold
>>
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>>13416481
oh, well here you go stud~
>>
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>>13416480
Get in the fucking fryer you little shit
>>
>>13416498
>stud
unf...
>>
>>13416497
WEL BECAUSE OF THAT YOU FOREVER WILL NEVER HAVE A CHANCE WITH CHEERILEE
>>
>>13416498
That's not what I meant.
I meant the dance done on my lap.
>>
>>13416507
hey, it works for what I need it for
>>
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>>13416506
>>
>>13416506
what is the best way to prepare a cheerilee

saute with daisy leaves?
>>
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>>13416496
>>
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>>13416507
I can't dance on your lap you silly billy!
My rock-hard hooves would shatter the bones in and around your pelvis and probably liquefy your genitals into a useless bloody goop!
>>
>>13416450
You try not to yelp. Really, truly, you try. But suddenly you recognize quite a few instruments being used in shows on TV or plays for when things go very, very badly. You're pretty sure you see one for when ribs break and your lungs start pulling the bones in in a "flail" -

And so your low-key attempt to get Peaches' attention comes out "PEACHES!"

In the abstract you're impressed he's the only staff member that so much as looks up from their work on the machines or checking equipment for sterility.

In the real you're gripping the chair with white knuckles.

comes to your side, face to face. "What, is there something wrong?"

>>13416485
You manage to spit out, "I could very well ask you the same thing!" jabbing a finger at the chest-breaker, the epi-pen, the ... you think that shouldn't be seen in public unless it's fixing a liver.

Peaches follows your gaze and his eyes widen in realization, "Oh! OH! Oh no, please, those are last-ditch things."

You force yourself to breathe calmly. You trust him implicitly. When he says last ditch by god he'll use them all to get you out of the ditch. "The heart stuff?"

He says nothing, but the flex around his eyes and a twitch of his ears says "Megan." You're suddenly aware that these other attendants may not be privvy to any knowledge about her and change the subject.

"So, you think a mare is gonna want a guy with a head full of mush?"

He pulls a face and starts flipping switches just under your right shoulder. "Mmmmmmmaybe."

Any other questions?
>>
>>13416542
That's not how lapdances work, Pinkie. look it up
>>
>>13416531
Dp you think twilight smells good. Would she make a good cuddle buddy. Do you think she'd let me pet her mane and massage her neck
>>
>>13416542
no.. no.. Pinkie
you dont literally get on my lap and dance
you dance in front of me and put your butt and hips into it like.. damnit where's Rarity to show you how it's done
>>
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Well the rest of /mlp/ is kill
I'm going to be here for a while.
What spoiler info videos etc we have about season 4?
>>
>>13414561
I play, I rarely compose anything though.
Here, have a bit something I've been practicing for a month or so.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s06zHx9Tx6jJ
>>
>>13416531
>>13416555
I keep having trouble picturing any pony as having a particular scent, other than Applejack who probably always smells of hay, fresh grass, and simple soap in some measure.
>>
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>>13416559
for something like that you want a very tall, slender pony
one that can really get off the ground
>>
>>13416562
Nothing. Who cares? Wait and you will be pone.

Read the comic. Don't post. Read. Read and you will be pone.
>>
>>13416562
Nothing beside what we got from Comic Con
The earliest we'll get some good in my opinion info is middle of October
>>
>>13416569
I always imagined Fluttershy to smell like flowers with a hint of dirty animals. Rarity probably wears alot of expensive fragrance, too.
>>
>>13416562
Hasn't been any new news on season 4 for a good while, as far as I know.
>>
>>13416562
Only some rumors, and pretty faint ones.
>>
>>13416548
Jab at Peaches that you might take him if no mare is willing. Possibly by force.
Then try to pull off your best black guy voice and say "We can do this the easy way, or the hard way. It's your choice."
>>
>>13416548
this >>13416589
and grab his junk
>>
>>13416589
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76LD2cTQeSU
>>
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>>13416579
I do i poni
>>13416582
>>13416585
>>13416588
You could say I been out for 6 months,
care to link me?
>>
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*vomits all over the hyper-saturated bloom*
>>
>>13416642
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szJboWgMN_4
>>
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>>
>>13416642
yayponies
in the books section
our linkboard is forbidden so I dare not say more
>>
>>13416651
I briefly considered writing fanfiction based on other mlpg fanfiction!

I might do it again some time!
>>
thread is sleep.
How many anons are here? Chistery and I, and then I think like 5 people are responding to chistery, plus the random posters

I gauge at most 10 people in the thread.

Hi guys!
>>
>>13416647
Wind Waker HD is like taking the 3D game that has aged the most gracefully — and then vomiting diarrhea all over it.
>>
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I want to do this with normal pone
>>
>>13416579
>Read and you will be pone.
I must be doing something wrong, it's not working!
>>
>>13416651
There are MLP episodes based on other MLP episodes

The difference is the shitty writers are paid, and have their awful ideas made into episodes, so giving us the crystal kingdom
>>
>>13416656
http://strawpoll.me/407448
>>
>>13416664
>no "No" option
Faggot
>>
>>13416656
I'm on my phone because i'm away for the weekend so posting is a bitch. Hi.
>>
>>13416664
>no option for no
fuck you and fuck your survey
>>
Pony is trying to walk like you. She can't stay on two legs very well.

Pony fell down!
>>
>>13416655
You are worse that 9999 Terseahitlers
>>
>>13416680
mock pony and give her some "knee" and "elbow" pads

try to walk like a pony without injuring self
>>
>>13416670
>>13416674
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fibDNwF8bjs
>>
>>13416682
then I bet it upsets you to know there are two different fanfictions I was thinking about spinning off

and a third if I'm allowed to count a harry potter spin off too
>>
>>13416680
The head flies off in a bloody arch!
>>
>>13416680
I run over to pony to make sure she's okay, then laugh with her and give her a hug
>>
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>>13416664
No "Yes but I just got here" option.
>>
>>13416695
I'd love to see a MLP/A:TLA crossover.

Everything changed when the Earth Ponies attacked.
>>
>>13416695
Remember to add as many weird furry OCs as possible, even if it's in name only. Your writing has to literally ooze autism.

If reading it doesn't make foul smelling milky liquids seep from the screen you did it wrong.
>>
>>13416696
Remove and salt the pelt while the corpse is still fresh!

Quickly, cut the meat into strips and hang it to dry before the flies get it!
>>
>>13416699
http://strawpoll.me/407474
>>
>>13416701
>The Earth ponies attack
>peasuses laugh at them from clouds
>unicorns levitate them a few centimeters so they can't move and laugh at them from the clouds
>>
>>13416685
Pony looks like she's about to cry! She doesn't want no stinking pads from you!
Luckily, >>13416697 is here to give pony hugs. Pony feels a little better. Pony wants to try again! Pony thinks you must be lonely as the only 2-legger.

>>13416696
no
>>
>>13416589
You're sort of settling in. It might be psychosomatic but you're pretty sure this building doesn't have shielding in all the flooring. In any case you feel gravity and a feeling of being seated square with the world. You've not felt less disoriented since arriving.

The banter with Peaches helps. You always talk shit during testing he can weasel into performing. The slight humming grows to a treble but all you can hear is him saying, "Head full of mush, terrible long streak of nothing, got those spider-claw hand things, your knees are knobby - don't tell me that's racist, they're like doorknobs."

You chuckle lowly as he begins pulling down the little panels at points at your temple and signalling for an assistant to turn on a machine. The blue stone at your left seems to be lighting but not the right. He frowns and makes a complicated motion off-handedly the assistant seems to understand perfectly. At once the constellation of stones around your head start to shine.

He shoots you a nervous look. It's the one he thinks is a calm one. "We're ready when you are, after the restraints."

You bite your lip, then look at him a little sly. This is just too rich. "You mean you're gonna take me by force since no mare's willing?"

He balks and then shoots you daggers. He goes about the perimeter of the chair, latching the left hand, then the left leg, right leg -- all the while you're gesticulating wildly with the right hand. He'll have to work for it.

You've gone through some "Black Snake Moan" jokes he's not going to get for context before he grabs your hand with surprising strength and latches it down. You give a faux-surprised look. "We can do this the easy way, or the hard way, huh?!"

Peaches perches on the stool again and comes close to your face with the best scowl you've seen him do in a while. Looks to the left, then the right to check for an assistant watching -- this is going to be a hell of a zinger, you can tell-
>>
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>>13416562

Last official thing I heard about was the season 4 animatics
>>
>>13416716
>Luckily for the Earth Ponies, they control all of the food.
>All of it.
>>
>>13416703
that's hilarious because I was just thinking of ways I could add a bunch of characters and then immediately abandon them
because that's how you get people to draw you fan art
>>
>>13416717
The Pony torso explodes in bloody gore!
>>
>>13416566
>Chopin on guitar
That just sounds uncomfortable and brilliant at the same time.
>>
>>13416736
>Unicorns just summon flowers and eat them
>provide weather service to other races in exchange for food
>>
>>13416743
Davies pls go
>>
>>13416736
>day zero
>pegasus ponies raid farms under heavy cloudcover
>get away with a decent amount of food
>set fire to whatever they can't haul
>>
>>13416743
QUICK, FIND THE HEART AND EAT IT RAW! ONLY THEN CAN YOU GAIN PONE'S POWER!
>>
>>13416757
>day one
>pegasi and unicorns remember that plants grow without earth ponies
>unicorns like twilight can cast growth spells
>day two
>earth pony genocide
>>
>>13416757
ok let's balance this out a little

Unicorns get to be the firebenders
Pegasi OBVIOUSLY AIRBENDERS

Earth ponies have Earthbenders and Water benders.

does that even things out a little?
>>
>>13416720
And that's all she wrote.
Wrap it up folks.
>>
>>13416717
I reassure pony and I tell her it means I always get a good view for parades. But pony is welcome to try if she wants to. I ready myself to catch her if she tries it again
>>
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>>13416736

But we know pegasi can get plant related cutie marks too

and the everfree forrest grows fine with no pony intervention at all

and equestria had greenery before any ponies arrived

Not to mention how the other species feed themselves, not having any pones at all

Clearly the earth ponies only grow all the food because the other two types just do not want to be bothered and forced them into the role

The other ponies can garden just fine if they so choose
>>
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>>13416770
>balance
get fucked
>>
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>>13416650
Thank you.
Dat Luna even if I don't like her that much
Dat new map
Dat new city location
>>13416654
Wat.
>>
>>13416787
the balance of power must be preserved
>>
>>13416778
Earth ponies confirmed for pampered serf class.

Again.
>>
>>13416720
And suddenly his lips are pressed to yours, roughly, shakily. He tastes of grapefruit juice and one forelimb holds you terribly tight. It's your first real contact in months other than checking for veins or elbow reflexes.

The worst of it is suddenly not being able to hug back. You're not sure whether you want to kiss back.

He pulls away, eyes clear. His voice is low and tender, the machines' humming drowning it out for everyone else. "We'll see after we're done here, okay?"

He leans forward. You're pretty certain you know what switch he's reaching for. "Are you ready?"

YES
NO
DESTROY ALL REAPERS
>>
>>13416808
Spurt out "IT WAS A GODDAMN JOKE" and ASSUME DIRECT CONTROL
>>
>>13416801
Balance is a thing invented by the weak to guilt the strong into serving them. The earth ponies are a menace to proper society; they must be taught their place.
>>
>>13416778
All the other points are sound, but having a plant-related cutiemark doesn't mean they necessarily have a plant-related talent: remember Cheerilee.
>>
http://i.imgur.com/KWasqc2.png
>>
>>13416801
the balance of power is only preserved through friendship

if a pony tribe starts shit that pony tribe can suffer for a generation

Unicorn extraction teams will be sent to collect the children for refugee camps
>>
>>13416820
But they're nice
>>
>>13416825
That is beyond disgusting. Even Hitler would vomit because of that.
>>
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>>13416825
>>
>>13416808
LET'S DO THIS
WE OWE THIS HORSE A VICTORY KISS
>>
>>13416827
Name three worthwhile mudponies.
>>
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>>13416825
>>
>>13416808
wait where are the anesthetics
>>
>>13416827
>But they're nice
in this scenario they struck first and attempted to hoard the food
>>
>>13416838
twilight sparkle
rarity
rainbow dash
>>
>>13416825
damnit button you said you werent taking pictures
>>
>>13416847
I see what you did there

I dont like it
>>
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>>13416824

True true. But she also has an unusually complex cutie mark. Most of the "simple" ones we have seen tend to match up closely with what is pictured, talent wise

Though yeah I guess you are right in that we can't rely on it 100%
>>
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ITT people doesn't know about Kallipolis
>>
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Mares should kiss mares
Stallions should kiss stallions too
>>
>>13416882
mares should kiss femanons
>>
>>13416882
so you're saying
pony should kiss pony?
>>
>>13416882
how about stallions kissing mares?
>>
>>13416882
unf
>>
>>13416888
femanons should kiss femanons
>>
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>>13416882
What if I kiss pony right on the mouth?
>>
>>13416882
Ponies have no concept of homosexuality. Since it's considered a detriment to reproductive efficiency and social health, magic is used to prevent it from ever arising in the first place.
>>
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>>13416899
if you're looking for humans kissing humans I think you're in the wrong place
>>
>>13416916
what a stupid fanon
>>
>>13416916
Not even for fun?
>>
>>13416916
why would they need to suppress it?
it could work as a natural check against overpopulation
>>
>Search 'human on pony action, gay'
>54 results
>90% of it has the human as the top

I can't
I just can't
>>
>>13416816
>>13416837
You hiss loud enough to be sure he hears you, "IT WAS A GODDAMN JOKE, PEACHES."

He catches your eye, only perfunctorily sheepish. "Give me a break. Heat of the moment and all. You know, slopes of Hell."

You just chew your lip. You're pretty certain you shouldn't even shake your head in exasperation or your brains will melt or something.

"Whatever, hit the button, Fabio."

The name must translate well enough, because he does.

The BLUE gets treMMENDOUS all around and
you wink out of consciousness
and wake up in a stream of something else
It's all glimmers and light
You feel-are-will-be-have-been passing through tunnels and wires. Low voices and shouts beat like drums. You see-taste-feel a gate approaching. Something pushes all things onward.

You reach out with a baby's hand. A ten year old's catching glove. Long tan sinews from the day on the beach. The grubby white you've taken on.

The blue pushes you forward. The gate is just an oval, an overlarge can light transparency gel. It calls to you. The River is strong.

Do you resist?
>>
>>13416942
Good.
>>
>>13416916
That is super dumb
>>
>>13416948
CHARGE UP THAT GODDAMN RIVER
>>
>>13416888
fillies should kiss femanons
>>
>>13416930
I'm 100% gay, so I'm allowed to recognize homosexuality as a mental illness and overall bane. It's suboptimal, it's love for the sake of love, and love for the sake of love is a sick, useless, selfish perversion.

That's why I lied and donated a shitton of semen to a sperm bank. Wasting genes is bad for the species. Thank god for the gay being caused by an early hormonal imbalance, it makes you more likely to be the tall, masculine guy sperm banks pay for.

Stay sensitive, straight people
>>
>>13416948
You were doing that for hours already before I went to sleep and now that I'm back you are still at it. Did you even take a break?
>>
>>13416981
>I'm allowed to recognize homosexuality as a mental illness
I'm pretty sure that's not how it works
>>
>>13416981
Are you retarded?
>>
>>13416948
If you're stranded in the middle of Siberia with just a winter coat, a knife, a zippo and a bottle of iodine, you ain't just giving up because "it's your fate"
Of course you'll jump in the frozen river if you have to. And damnit, you'll swim to the other side.
>>
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>>13416975
colts should kiss femanons
>>
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>>13416981
>>
>>13416981
>love for the sake of love is a sick, useless, selfish perversion.

I... what?
>>
>>13416998
Stallions should violate femanons

Jalm pls
>>
>>13416985
Not from what I've seen, and it's been nigh on 11 hours now.
...Maybe I should get off the general for a bit too.
>>
>>13416981
You are an alright guy_______________
>>
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>>13416981
>>
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>>13416998
>>
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>>13417001
>>
>>13417034
>bestprincesswithnoears.png
But where am I supposed to whisper all those things into then.
>>
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>>13416998
LOOK OUT FOR THAT INCREDIBLY BLURRY CHUCKYA
>>
>>13417042
her ass
>>
>>13417042
Her mouth. or her butt, your choice
>>
>>13416958
The RivER beckons you. It is what pushes you. It is what pulls you. Both are possible here. Both are the only possible things here.

You hear and smell something like patchiouli. Yak ghi. A beach ball on a parkway. The last at least you think is your own.

A low thunder on the plains. All are in fear of the Red. A screaming. The sound of gunfire.

You don't notice them. The gate is so close now. The stillness is inviting. You catch shadows of others, twisting away from its light.

Your longest fingers (all of them, all your life, the longest fingers, something like a chicken-wing spindle) touch the border. It's so cold it's almost hot. It's like diving into a pool. It doesn't even register before your eyes/mouth/nose/everything breakk through aaanandddd

Something tears away like a false skin. That is inaccurate. You have no skin. Something has left a gouge like a steak knife's answer pernicious tumor. The pain is there but true.

Bit by bit the feeling returns. Teeth muscle gums back legs and fingers and toes and bits right down to the stupid stub-

You lost the word for that. Oh.

Jejeune or bestride
>>
>>13417052
>>13417053
>whispering things into her ass
That's not very romantic, Anon.
>>
>>13416985
>>13417014
Some men just want to see the world burn.

Some people just want to prove they can finish a goddamn story after being called a worthless witch-dyke for three years

Me, I like kindling
>>
>>13417054
what the fuck just happened
>>
>>13417064
you're doing a wonderful job
>>
>>13417058
Then pony lied to me.
>>
>>13417054
And then the surgery did absolutely nothing except for setting your hair on fire.
>>
>>13417073
we're tripping balls here
there's some kind of weird puzzle to which way we're supposed to go, but I can't understand it
>>
>>13417082
pony didn't really like you because you're not a horse

pony is only attracted to pony
>>
>>13417095
But I am a pony.
>>
>>13417054
Huh..
>>
>>13417082
>"Oh yes Anon, whisper dirty things into my ass, this is so hot."

You aren't the smartest, are you?
>>
>>13417099
No

You are a goat
>>
>>13417107
I wish pony would whisper lewd things whilst pressing her face to my buttcheeks.
>>
>>13417054
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejTgl3cCyDo
take it home
>>
>>13417118
I kinda do to, but not because it's romantic but because it means that pony is real and loves me, too.
>>
>>13417073
An inner voice speaks through a muffled telephone speaker, "What just happened."

That's a very good question.

>>13417087
While it's possible your hair is on fire, you'd think there would be some light in this sudden endless void-

And suddenly everything is periwinkle blue. It also appears to be the inside of an enormous hollow tower.

Gravity is welcoming after formless void but it seems to want to pull you down. Very quickly.

You're only half a mind (literally) but pretty certain you shouldn't be falling for more than, oh, twenty seconds before hitting the ground.

That seems about right. Twenty seconds. If you could remember force equals mass times some dumb bullshit you could logic your way out of this.

As it is you see a too-small kiddy pool on a gingam-red set of tiles. It's some ways off but it's a good guess if you don't flop around you'll land in it.

The water is a violent eye-sucking blue. It seems the place to land.

Gipsy Motors or Tesla
>>
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the best-pony slut poll is invalid because it doesn't have any oc ponies

I know OC ponies that are at LEAST as slutty as Rarity
>>
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I want to have a romantic relationship with a stallion
>>
>>13417151
UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF LOVE
>>
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>>13417087
>>13417105
>>13417091
RUN
>>
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>>13417175
NOT SCARED
>>
>>13417169
That's fucking terrible
>>
>>13417173
You choose to understand the concept of love. A good choice for a refusenik, which has subtly beaten out "jerkwad" in your vocabulary. It seems a good choice too. And now you enjoy lemon curd over peanut butter and decide pineapple is okay on pizza.

As you choose to understand to UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF LOVE a thrilling soundtrack swells in the thin frictionless vacuum that you swear should be relevant to the matter at hand right now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJMqGHofdec

Also now you seem to be blazing out long trails of lightning from every digit. Your mouth fills with the taste of Nickelodeon Goo popsicles and the small blue pool is within "110% sure to make it with or without a barrel roll" distance.

DO IT
or
PANSY OUT
>>
I want to have a romantic relationship with anything but a pony
>>
>>13417230
third option

DO THE BARREL ROLL
>>
>>13417185
TRAITOR
Somewhere in a too-deep level of consciousness a person's knowledge of the NES Godzilla copypasta is lanced away, leaving him none the worse for wear.

That was nice of you.
>>
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Why aren't you going to the local NFL game with your dad today?

He just wants to spend time with you.

He loves you so much and wants you to be happy.
>>
>>13417241
anything but a pony's definition of romantic may or may not involve biting your head off during sex

are you sure about this
>>
>>13417241
Spike arrives at your door with flowers and a large gemstone. "Am I late?"
>>
>>13417241
I want to have a romantic relationship with a pony's butt.
>>
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>>13417042
ok fine
>>
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>>13417241
>not wanting a loving, intimate relationship with pony
>>
>>13417230
Are we in the 60s now?
It's about time we wake the fuck up.
>>
Did the fags leave yet?
>>
>>13417253
>>13417250
I was expecting something better, but not as good as the pony that I do not deserve
>>
>>13417247
i'm going to a baseball game today with my brothers
It's Star Wars day!
Two years ago I got Brian Wilson encased in carbonite, and last year I got a Death Star baseball.
>>
>>13417260
That is way better. I want to hold her close and whisper "Snow White" into her ear
>>
>>13417282
gilda crashes through your window with a box of chocolate coated rabbit hearts in claw

"sup dweeby-weeby, wanna go on a date?"
>>
>>13417247
My dad only gives a shit about me when I achieved something he can boast with - well, even then he really doesn't, he just boasts.
>>
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>>13417291
she asks you to leave
>>
>>13417291
Celestia closes her eyes and smiles gently, and with a single graceful movement, positions her lips so that they brush gently against your ear

"get out before i call security"
>>
>>13417287
>going to a Giants game when you should be watching the Niners

do you even heavy favorite to with the NFC?
>>
>>13417247
Mainy because there are pretty much no football leagues where I live, but also because my dad is a cunt and I can't even begin to give a fuck about him
>>
>>13417243
You decide doing a BARREL ROLL is pedestrian. BARREL ROLLS are where it's at. You finish the totally awesome flourish you remember practicing from the fourth grade as it supercedes the vaccum left by American History.

To be fair the aggregate "George Washington could kick bears in the neck all day long" puts you ahead of most of the public back home-

>>13417265
That thought dies out as you splash into the water. You very pleasantly dissolve into the woozy feeling you get at parties after a few too many.

There's a sucking noise and sweet calming darkness. A bit fleshy for your tastes.

And suddenly at once you remembered - distinctly - this was your designated meat castle and your tastes rearranged to the norm.

"FUCK," you hear very clearly off to your right. You don't seem to have the hang of opening the garage doors you call windows to the outside world. You get the unpleasant suspicion that whole process is still being injected into the base of your skull.

"THAT is why I buy Union parts. Someone go get Juniper, I need some help here."

COUGH
or
ATTEMPT TO URINATE
>>
>>13417247
My dad doesn't follow sports.
It's hard to say what he enjoys anymore.
>>
>>13417331
VOMIT PROFUESLEY
>>
>>13417332
He enjoys drinkingand writing greentexts about throbbing, sweaty marecocks
>>
>>13417169
OC pones can't be the best-pony at anything. Automatically disqualified for being retarded shit.
>>
>>13417323
look i don't know much about baseball but I know jack shit about handegg

but we got these tickets months ago so yeah
>>
>>13417247
Because my dad is dead
And he didn't care much for me when he was alive anyway
>>
>>13417331
Declare that you are the next president of MY United States of ASSFUCK and VOMIT PROFUSELY
>>
>>13417300
I'll just take the pony
>>
>>13417346
are you even slightly impressed that I knew which game you were going to?
>>
>>13416882

>boner

It's not because they're ponies. It's the situation. Yes. That's it.
>>
what is even going on
>>
> a long-winded boring greentext about feelings in a single room becomes a kaleidoscopic experience

People wonder why I come here
>>
>>13417345
the ones on the show aren't much better

especially the background ponies. most of them are worse.
>>
>>13417247
Because I don't live near my dad.
>>
rnewbaII is dead
>>
>>13417369
not really
i mean, brian wilson was a pretty big hint even though he's a Dodger now
>>
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When's that new episode again?
>>
THINK OF YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MANE CAST
DONE?

She just died. How do the others react to this,
>>
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>>13417386
Who?
>>
>>13417312
>>13417319
Oh no, please give me another chance Princess... I swear I will address your with your proper title the next time!
>>
>>13417403
she called security
>>
>>13417373
Hard to say, Chistery has been having stories everytime I come here.
I have to wonder if the guy sleeps.

We can always talk about some ponies or something if you'd like.
>>
>>13417395
HOLY SHIT AJ YOU'RE ALIVE AGAIN
23th November
>>
>>13417396
sad because muh friends
>>
>>13417396
>applejack

Nobody cares

Applejack mini can replace her
>>
>>13417396
>Twilight

Sadness.
There's a big royal funeral and everything.
Celestia's eulogy brings all the attendants and everyone watching the show to cry uncontrollably.
>>
>>13417403
you should probably be running
>>
>>13417396
They plant an apple tree over her
They have more in depth conversations now that she's gone
>>
>>13417408
I'm going to make myself scarce, but not actually leave the palace.
>>
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>>13417395
>>
>>13417402
I want to bury myself in that bird
>>
>>13417396
Rarity.

Nobody seemed to notice at first.
>>
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>>
>>13417414

I come back every new season and people are always so surprised

Still Saturdays at 10, right?
>>
>>13417446
We don't know the exact time, only that it's on the 23th.
>>
>>13417432
The magical barrier grows from the center of the castle, designed to push humans outward. if you don't scram, you'll be crushed against a wall.
>>
>>13417446
Not sure what time.
>>
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>>13417396
>>
>>13417438
that bird wants to bury itself in you

congratulations you are loved
>>
>>13417432
>putting the whole palace on lockdown

good fucking luck, buddy
>>
>>13417396
>Twilight
That's quite literally impossible. Hasbro would not let it happen, and 90% of all plots depend on her. It cannot physically happen.
>>
>>13417342
Your perioception - that's a word people said a lot around you lately, you think - returns with a sick sour lurch. You have the disgusting realization there are intestines moving around in your middle.

You remembered a story about someone losing theirs and getting used in a note but

Thinking about that just makes you want to VOMIT PROFUSELY

You try - it seems easy enough - but somehow you just get heaves and a nasty trickling down your nose.

Something rubs up against it, wicking it away, "Yeah, some asshole, right Anon?"

Your best friend "be able to open eyes" makes his arrival and you see a small pony rubbing a white hankie in your face.

He seems like a nice pony. You hope he has a nice day.

>>13417359
The sick feeling down in your guts won't go away. Maybe too much cream of wheat. You attempt to VOMIT PROFUSELY and declare something. More snot comes out.

You wheeze. Some half-words form.

The pony brings himself closer. "What was that?"

"Issaid DON'T MESS WITH THE SAINTS."

Tapdance
or
Attempt to assess your new aphasia
>>
>>13417458
This is some Sonic 3 tier shit.
Alright, find an exit or window that's not high above the ground.
>>
>>13417424
No. I'll just fall on my knees and cling to one of her legs, begging her to not send me away.
>>
>>13417478
I have no idea what's going on
how did this all even start?
>>
>>13417470
Jesus christ how horrifying

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8mQiXKKfWw
>>
>>13417458
... I'm sure she's bluffing. She wouldn't kill me, that doesn't sound like Celestia at all.
>>
>>13417478
Oooh! Proprioception?
Can we sit up?
What limbs do we have!?
Can we feel our extremities?

Will we ever walk again!?
Don't actually try to walk though, that's probably a bad idea
>>
>>13417498
anon is a pony sex machine so they're wiping his memory to remove his devilish charms
>>
>>13417478
Aw shit text area broke, sorry
>>
>>13417478
Think about stuff logically and strain your every subparticular string to remember everything you ever learned
>>
>>13417498
Anon's brains are literally chock full of a curse that forces ponies to murder freely, especially if they've fallen asleep within range of Anon.

He just went through the invasive process of removing it. We're not quite certain if he's okay.
>>
>>13417480
OH SHIT THE BLOCK YOU NEEDED TO JUMP ON TO GET TO THE WINDOW DISAPPEARED

TOO BAD

YOU DIE WHILE TRYING TO SCRAMBLE UP A WALL

LIVES REMAINING: 2
>>
>>13417509
She sent her sister to the moon, her pupil to another world, and turned Discord to stone.
If she doesn't like [thing] she's probably going to do something about it.
>>
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>>13417511
>>13417525
wow ok
>>
>>13417511
>sex god anon
>>13417525
>fluffy anon drowns

which one is worse? i can't tell.
>>
>>13417544
But she loved her sister, cares about Twilight and Discord actually did something to deserve it contrary to me.
>>
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>>13417544
I have an image macro for that but I like the way you said it more
>>
>>13417556
Actually, you did the exact thing that got discord turned to stone in the first place. Good going asshole.
>>
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>>13417560
>tyrany
>>
>>13417556
She loved her sister, but did it anyway.
Pretty blatantly banished Sunset Shimmer and sure, Discord deserved what he got.
>>
>>13417570
Wait, Discord got turned into stone for calling her Snow White and not immediately leaving when she told him? I thought it was because of all the whacky chaos shit.
>>
>>13417584
>banished Sunset Shimmer
I'm pretty sure she went through the portal on her own
>>
>>13417587
She thought the wacky chaos shit was fun.
>>
>>13417584

>>13417598
She ran into her portal when Celestia just told her to get out.
>>
>>13417396
>Fluttershy
Well all of them would be sad, yada yada yada.
An wild critter would always be there watching over the grave, each day a different one. They'd also bring flowers every week during the night.

This is boring
better idea
Least favorite mane cast dies but it's because the other 5 fucked up.
how do they react now?
>>
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>>13417603
It's always a good feel when people post things you worked on.
>>
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>>13417603
calm down bro
>>
>>13417626
You worked on shitposting?
>>
>>13417514
Your whole life history is swimming like vegetables in minestrone but you're almost absolutely certain you can't do that

You're pretty certain you have fingernails still, and you're itchy from the things around your hands.

>>13417510
You need to take stock of your body parts but they all seem to be resting comfortably despite gravity.

You remember "sit ups" in the abstract but you feel so weird and tired all over you couldn't even without the itchy things around the wrists.

You feel plenty of extremities. Everything is some extreme weird point of light. Something tells you that's probably a good sign

Maybe

Another pony has come to the opposite side. It's so hard to move your eyes left or right, but this pony gets close to your face too. She is slate blue and has a nice sweater on. She smells nice.

"Oh no, is he okay?" She signs a pen light across your eye. It follows it like a not-so-smart kitten.

"Well his whole brain just got shunted through magical barriers and he thought making an egg in a styrofoam cup was Transmutation, so --"

The words make you a little angry but the rolodex you store all your snippy words seems to be shuffled out of order.

Grunt
or
Snap finger angrily
>>
>>13417653
No, I removed the parasprite from that gif.
>>
>>13417636
/)
>>
>>13417626
We do not got anything from you,scum.
>>
>>13417599
Well, if she'll reject me like that, there is no point in living anymore anyway. I guess I'll just sit down in front of a wall and wait for the magic bubble.
>>
>>13417614
again, Rarity

they hide the body and tell everyone she left with a stallion.
>>
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>>13417656
You give a little wheeze and a biology textbook slide blares like a trumped in your head. You remember drawing a bigger penis in your textbook.
>>
>>13417663
Shame, too. You would've benefited from my grammar capabilities.
>>
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>>13417647
>moon
>2013
>>
>>13417675
Are we getting a fucking lobotomy?
>>
>>13417666
>when questioned they all say the same thing
>"some huge unicorn & a train headed for Canterlot"
>>
>>13417547
> fluffy anon drowns
Not nearly, he's just under reconstruction.

>>13417696
No, this was a little crazier than an ice pick.
>>
>two shitposters tryign desperatly to derail the writefag thing MLPG finally got going again after years of writing absense
>>
>>13417690
>primarch mewball

dibs on the geneseed
>>
>>13417707
> your face when it just keeps going, crazy shti and all

I'm not certain who to root for
>>
>>13417656
Try to speak something coherent
>>
>>13417614
AJ: Would be the only one at the funeral, say she's sorry, leaves an apple on her grave
Dash: Would leave the town as fast as she goes. Wonders the world on a journey of guilt, sorrow and self discovery
Rarity:Would go after the funeral, cry there, beg for forgiveness. She'd also visit at night to leave some flowers when she can
Twilight: Locks herself in the Library, refuses to speak to everyone, even with Spike she's cold and only talks to him when she needs something. Would visit her at night, leave some flowers without saying anything except sorry and go home
Pinkie: most affected but manages to still be her old self, at least in public. Sometimes she wonders how long can she make the others smile if she can't make herself smile.
>>
>>13417712
you just want to weild your mighty battlethumbs
>>
>>13417656
SAY THINGS THAT ARE WORDS GOOD
>>
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>>
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>>13417705
Wait, we're getting our primary motor and sensory cortex severed?
Harsh.
>>
>>13417747
heh
>>
>>13417757
Yeah, and spamming celestia images in a 4chan thread is a real talent, I'm sure
>>
>>13417763
With any luck, they rebuilt it!
the problem is that unicorn brain surgeons don't really have a map of what goes on under a human skull
>>
>>13417707
>