I pick klondyke.

>rape

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Celestia, she's so
uh
she's like
She's a wonderful lady and nothing is funny about her and she's great.

>But the "fap" sound is produced by air being trapped, compressed, and escaping in the process of male masturbation via hands or some other penis-encircling device and the foreskin.

>Horses masturbate by other means. Besides, you can't make a "clop" sound with hoof-on-flesh.

>>33605633
Dash.

I enjoy fireworks.

>>33605673
.......You win this round anonymous

>>33605633

>roast
>pony

no ;_;

>>33605695
Schl-schli-shli.

Mock her alcoholism and poor parenting skills in front of everyone. It's ok because she would be totally out of it at a roast anyway

>>33605695
>hoof-on-flesh
sounds painful..

time for a checkup

>>33605695
thread ruined before it began

>>33605629
yes, none of that stimpy and ren gay shit remake. god that sucked so bad.

>>33605747
Helooooooo nurse.

>>33605691
Her wings are so pretty, too.

>>33605695
It's two hooves working together down there.

>lyras dream car

>Derpy Roast
>two hours of retard jokes
>she doesn't understand the concept of a roast and takes it personally

>>33605683
>just a question, why are people calling the threads horses now? I don't really get it, other than the threads being about ponies I mean

Cause of this

>>33605717
Jacklerov? I'd read it.

>>33605801
To be fair, the butt of a lot of roasts don't 'get' roasts and take things far too seriously.

>>33605621

>Everything but the end.
Gold.

>>33605724
YES

>I am now imagining Rover dogging Rarity at her roast

COME ON EVERYPONI SMILE SMILE SMILE!

>>33605717
>hotdiggitydemon on GG

This art needs to be made more.

>humanization that manages to p much evade sameface

i wonder if JJ is getting hiccups right now haha

>>33605846
I, huh...

>>33605852
What would their babies look like?

>>33605846
kay

>>33605839
It's hard not too.

>>33605866
what
are we pone thread simulator now

>rape
>a gift from God

>Braeburn roast
>2 hours of Brokeback Mountain jokes

>>33605846
STAND BACK! SHE WANTS MY DICK!

>>33605866
what drawing are you talking about ?

>>33605887
like this

>>33605903
Woah dude, trigger warning please

>>33605846
Twilight why are you so sexy.

>>33605903
> rape
> a gift from Celestia
I wonder if it still grafts.

>>33605903
>forcing his daughter to give birth

That's worse than forcing her to have sex

> humanization that p much manages to evade sameface issue

i wonder if JJ is getting hiccups right now haha

>>33605903
>Supports Rape
>Launches C.U.M.

Things are not looking good for this guy

Too easy.

>>33605917
Fucking adorable

>>33605948
>equivalent of >rape
Santorum 2012 you fucks

>>33605747
nurse im afraid my dick tastes bad, i want a check out

>>33605961
I laughed too hard at this

>>33605903
ahahaha american christians are so retarded

>>33605905
have some celestia roast.

>>33605961

THE DUST BEHIND YOUR SOFA HAS GAINED SENTIENCE AND TAKEN THE FORM OF A PONY

WHAT DO

>>33605903
>giving this lunatic attention
>mfw this country is so ass-backwards that a guy like this is a serious contender for the most powerful office on Earth

This is why I watch ponies. So I can pretend shit like this isn't real for 22 minutes.

>>33605951
Why the hell does nobody draw Zecora with the mohawk?

Such bullshit

>>33605846
Fun fact: Mares only raise their tails when they are on heat

>>33606018
ITS A FUCKING ROAST THREAD WOLF NANAKI

>>33606018
Nobody likes you, is this really a surprise to you?

haha just kidding it's a roast thread

not really faggot I'd laugh if you died tomorrow

>>33605903
Pffthahaha.

>>33606041
I fucking know right.
Fucking conformists.

>>33606046
every mare in equestria is constantly horny

>>33606019
>Dust pony.
>It's fluffy.

>Fluffy pony.
>Spray it with water.
>It floats on the water.
>It will not break the surface, it is too light.

>>33606019
Holy shit that would be a pretty big pony.

>>33606019
Piss myself because there is a fucking dust pony in my house.

>>33605951
>check out Crownedapple's gallery
>ugly Ross-like faces everywhere

Nah

>>33606046

Then Twilight is in heat like 89% of the time.

This is acceptable.

>>33606041
Someone should draw her with a 'fro. That would be awesome.

>>33606102
>fluffy pony tries to catch it
>drowns

>>33606127
HAHAHAHAHAHA

Courtesy of this link someone posted a few threads back: http://prillalar.com/drabbles/


Pinkie and Rainbow Dash
by William Shakespeare

Enter Pinkie

Rainbow Dash appears above at a window

Pinkie:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the rainbow, and Rainbow Dash is the alligator.
Arise, exhilarating alligator, and lick the wet diaper.
See, how she leans her slit upon her hoof!
O, that I were a glove upon that hoof,
That I might touch that slit!

Rainbow Dash:
O Pinkie, Pinkie! wherefore art thou Pinkie?
What's in a name? That which we call a mane
By any other name would smell as beautiful
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like only milk and cheese can"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove incredible.

Pinkie:
Lady, by yonder wet diaper I swear
That tips on the bed the lovely cupcake--

Rainbow Dash:
O, swear not by the diaper, the smooth diaper,
That lovingly changes in its hyperactive orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise hyperactive.
Sweet, warm night! A thousand times warm night!
Parting is such iridescent sorrow,
That I shall say warm night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Pinkie:
Sleep dwell upon thy slit, peace in thy hoof!
Would I were sleep and peace, so huskily to rest!
softly will I to my exhilarating mane's cell,
Its help to lick, and my beautiful mane to tell.

>>33606026
If it makes you feel any better, he was never a serious contender

>>33606146

>>33605903
oh humanity...

>>33606127
Can we has a Fluffy pone drown thread?

>>33606177
what kind of reaction is that?

>>33605843
That image made me think of those hentais where they rape, gut, clean and roast girls.
Where is faceless when i need him to write something like this.

>>33606177
Shut the fuck up Nanaki

>>33606167
He never really even had much attention until like a week before the New Hampshire straw poll, which was fishy as fuck. Smelled like bought votes.

>you'll never get told by a strong motherely fluttershy
:(

>>33606180
NO. STOP DROWNING FLUFFY PONE

;_;

>>33606177
where is my hipster cat

>>33606213
>No wings

>>33606165
GabeN and Dr. Doak
by William Shakespeare

Enter GabeN

Dr. Doak appears above at a window

GabeN:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the Guile, and Dr. Doak is the Pony.
Arise, Mmmmmmmmmmmm Pony, and Duke Slap the Fat Applejack.
See, how he leans his Solid Snake upon his Episode 3 Balls!
O, that I were a glove upon that Episode 3 Balls,
That I might touch that Solid Snake!

Dr. Doak:
O GabeN, GabeN! wherefore art thou GabeN?
What's in a name? That which we call a Phat Ass
By any other name would smell as Fat
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a crab battle"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove Fat.

GabeN:
Swain, by yonder Fat Applejack I swear
That tips on a hot dog the Large Yu Yu Hakucho--

Dr. Doak:
O, swear not by the Applejack, the Bomb Applejack,
That carefully changes in its Small orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise Small.
Sweet, Striker night! A thousand times Striker night!
Parting is such Delay sorrow,
That I shall say Striker night till it be morrow.

Exit above

GabeN:
Sleep dwell upon thy Solid Snake, peace in thy Episode 3 Balls!
Would I were sleep and peace, so Sneak That Shit to rest!
shit finger painting will I to my Mmmmmmmmmmmm Phat Ass's cell,
Its help to Duke Slap, and my Fat Phat Ass to tell.

>>33606167
He's still in the race and he's still polling above 10%. That's a pretty terrifying commentary on the state of things.

>Murka

>>33606192
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF HENTAI DO YOU WATCH?!

>>33606208
That's been the GOP primary until recently. Everybody but Romney is a flash in the pan for a week or two until they find somebody else who's not Romney.

>>33606011
You've got one right here, and I obviously know how stupid this is.

>>33606213
...That cuts me deeper than you can possibly imagine.

>Bring box of Swiffers home.
>Open box.
>Pull out Swiffer.
>It moves in your hand.
>Drop it on the counter.
>Swiffer sweeper forms into a pony.
>Its fluffy as fuck.
>Walk around on the counter, rubbing on stuff and generally looking around.
>Notice it is dusting as it rubs on stuff.
>Realize you have been watching it do this for a good five minutes.

>>33606238
Perry's staying power has been a lot more disturbing to me. Like what the fuck.

>>33606248

Looks like Gingrich might be the ultimate contender, if his South Carolina numbers are any indicator.

>>33606052
YES I KNOW KLONDORK

>>33606080
I was almost died once.

>>33606165
Thank you, internet, for providing me with that image.

>>33606272
>She starts sweating
>drowns in her own sweat

>>33606275
My fucking brother was supporting Perry for the longest time. I tried to convince him that...

Nope, fuck this. I'm here to talk about ponies.

WHO IS YOUR THIRD-FAVORITE PONY AND WHAT'S THE BEST THING SHE'S DONE IN THE LAST FEW EPISODES

>>33606293
>pic

FUCKING DAMMIT WOLF
DERPY IS NOT ADDICTED TO MUFFINS

>>33606293
Nobody fucking cares

>there's something amiss with your fluffy pony
>she's done nothing but mope around the house for three days
>she's stopped eating. Her fluff has lost its sheen. At night you hear her crying, and you dont know why
>you go downstairs to where her pony-bed is to try comfort her. She never responds
>if you try pick her up, she falls limp in your arms
>you dont know what else to do
>you never wanted it to come to this
>morning
>you coax her over to the middle of the floor with a piece of strawberry. Her favorite.
>she slowly saunters over to you
>she looks at the fruit, but makes no move to eat it
>you tell her to sit down. She does
>those big eyes looking up at you
>all you want is for her to be happy
>you reach for her front hooves. The aligator clamps fit on easily
>they lead back to a large, switch operated battery
>short bursts of electricity reset a fluffy pony's short term memory
>it's what the vets usually do to treat them, but why go through the middle man
>you scratch her a little behind the ear and tell her that you love her
>you walk back to the battery. She stays put
>you flip the switch
>the result is immediate. Her body tenses up, almost throwing her off the ground
>she's on her side, her legs are twitching very fast, completely straight. Her neck is strained back. Her teeth are locked together. Her whole face is contorted in silent pain
>you cut the power
>she lies there, motionless
>you walk over to her
>she's crying silently. She sees you
>she tries screaming for help but she cant fully form the words
>you didnt do it long enough
>she remembers everything
>you rush back to the battery
>you have to do this again

watcha think of this drawin? I want to ink and color this

>>33606248
Yeah, but Santorum's moment in the sun was particularly acute. He just surged into the big leagues out of nowhere, and then everyone forgot him.

>>33606287
Then I guess it's 4 more years of Obama. Gingrich doesn't have a prayer.

>>33606309

>becomes Swiffer Wet pone

Get on the TF2 server niggus

>>33606287
I'd laugh pretty hard if he got the nomination.

>>33606275

???

he was another flash in the pan. Rocketed to the top when he announced, then quickly tanked.

>>33606340
>you turn it on again, watching her body writhe in agony
>you force yourself to wait
>you smell a tinge of burnt fluff
>you cut the power again and walk over to her
>she's still twitching slightly
>her eyes are black, the pupils completely dilated
>gingerly, you remove the aligator clamps from her legs
>the fluff beneath them is singed
>you cradle her in your arms and hold her close to you
>her eyes are locked forward in perpetual surprise
>she's trying to speak, but she can only form a single syllable
>"Ba... Ba... Ba... Ba..."
>you stay with her through the night
>after three hours of repeating that syllable, she finally fell asleep
>you kiss her on her forehead
>"I'll always love you. Now and forever."
>you put her back in her bed
>the next morning she's waiting for you, bright eyed and smiling

>>33606265
I want you to stop eating junk food and not accomplishing anything in life. NOW mister.

>>33606350
>Smells like oranges.

>>33606287
Please, Gingrich has so much dirt on him the democrats are hoping he'll pull through.

I miss Caine, he was hilarious

>>33606336
When you have a near death experience you start seeing ponies in real life. He knows more about ponies then we do

>>33606370
>drowns in her own juice

>>33606361
He's been in the race from the start, and has held third or fourth pretty consistently from what I've seen. He has a pretty dedicated base of support, and that's what disturbs me.

>>33606272
>pictured that in my head
I daww'd

>>33606366
...But the beer is still cool, right?

>>33606365
wow. i wasn't expecting that >feel

ECT for fluffy pone. interesting.

>>33606404
You know he dropped out last week, right?

>>33606366
I'm working on it! I'm a college student, and I cook most of my own meals. I just happen to get fast food a couple times a week because I sometimes get home too late to cook...

>>33606418
Lunas_OrgasmFace.png

>>33606327
MY THIRD FAVORITE IS PINKIE PIE

SHE BASICALLY RAN SHIT IN "THE LAST ROUNDUP"

IT WAS AMUSING

You know, I actually like the CMC now.

Remember when we used to dread their episodes?

>>33606344
I like.

Do it.

>>33606365
>her system is not working 100% yet
>she's so happy she doesn't care
>she tries to make you a breakfast
>but instead of the kitchen she goes to the bathroom
>she drowns in the tub

>>33606467
If I were to burgle this persons house, those pony things would be the only thing I would steal.

>>33606467

I liked the CMC before it was cool.

Show Stoppers is one of my favorite episodes

>>33606467
>Sweetie Belle's crotchboob

>trying to play TF2 on a server with vanilla only weapons
>game goes well, it's challenging but fun
>almost like Ecksbawks limitations with some pretty good players
>halfway through the match
>steamrolling everyone as a Scout
>been playing every fps known to man without crosshairs (even edited PC games back in the day to disable them when it wasn't ever an option)
>suddenly bronies out of nowhere
>not even ponyfags, full blown bronies
>worst possible players ever
>they just sit in the goddamn spawn and act like they're on LiveJournal
>we have RED keep their spawngate open so we can constantly shoot them
>bullshit love and taller ants crap they normally spew is in full force
>admin finally gets off his ass and bans them

For fuck's sake. You brony scum make us casual observers of the show seem like complete and utter shit when you pull this crap. I can't even discuss it like it were any other decent show on TV, because you horsefuckers must take every opportunity possible to announce your love for polychrome juvenile equines.

>>33606365
>>33606340
I was not ready for this.

>>33606505
Put your trip back on, Terse.

>>33606487
Hahahaha

>>33606440
Oh right, he went crying home after getting spanked in New Hampshire or something. Didn't he just get the evangelical vote just in the last few weeks?

This whole race is just such popcorn material.

>That feel when I don't really like Obama as a Democrat
>Won't reform prison system, the militarization of the police force, dissolve homeland security, or pull out of the middle east fast enough
>But will end up voting for him because he's less insane than the Republicans

Holy fuck you fuckers slow-motion Morgan Freeman is the greatest thing ever.

>>33606165
>http://prillalar.com/drabbles/
Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash were celebrating an autistic Valentine's Day together. Twilight Sparkle had cooked a sexy dinner and they ate inside the Congress hall by candlelight.

"My darling," Rainbow Dash said, stroking Twilight Sparkle's anus, "I have something for you." She gave a box to Twilight Sparkle. "It is but a blue token of my aspie-tier love."

Twilight Sparkle opened the box. Inside was a gay dick! She gazed at it constantly. Then she gazed at Rainbow Dash constantly. "It's ugly," Twilight Sparkle said. "Come here and let me fuck you."

Just then, a faggy pone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a bleached anus spewing oceans filled of rainbow hued dicks. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in an autistic voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.

Rainbow Dash read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my sister."

They stared at each other autistically as the pone cackled some more. Twilight Sparkle's balls began to tremble. Then Rainbow Dash shrugged, pulled out a Down's Syndrome, and hit the pone on her cock. She fell over dead.

"Problem solved!" Twilight Sparkle said and kissed Rainbow Dash abrasively. "This is a dumb Valentine's Day!"

They excessively burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.

And then they fucked each other all night long.

>watching presidental adress
>talking about jobs
>pacman pops up, with dogs and end line being "job"
>makes some spilled milk joke
welp we're boned.

>>33606540
>All according to plan

>>33606238
You want to hear terrifying?

People have been talking about the guy who gave the state of the union rebuttal using that speech to test the waters for him running for president. As in "get into the race even though Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina, and Florida will have cast their votes by this point'.

And people (by which I mean professional pollsters and statisticians) are saying that he would have a statistically non-zero chance of getting the nomination if he did.

That, my friend, is insane.

>>33606540
>That feel when he won a peace prize for a surge in a war we did not want.
>That feel when you still think he is less insane then the Republicans.
>That feel when at least Trump did not run.

I WANT FUCKING FLUFFY PONY ABUSE COMICS
I WANT THEM TO BE EVEN WORSE THAN THE JAP ABUSE COMICS ABOUT TOUHOU HEADS

>>33606510
go tell that to ponychan
there the real bronies

>>33606540
>he still thinks the Dems are or ever will be radically different than the Republicans
>two party system

>>33606586
ABUSE COMICS NO!

Drown comics, yes

>new years
>you were out with some friends
>you left fluffy pony at home to watch some TV
>she usually sits in front of it, mesmerized until you turn it off
>you guess sometime that night she accidentally hit the remote or something
>because when you got home, the TV was off and fluffy pony was gone.
>you got out the tracking device linked to a chip in her shoulder
>she was outside, a block or two down
>you walked down to find her
>you saw her a hundred yards or so away
>some teenagers were playing with her, throwing a ball and letting her catch it
>you see one of them motion for pony to come to him
>fluffy pony of course trots over immediately
>he holds something out to fluffy pony, and she puts it in her mouth
>suddenly the boy has fluffy pony in a headlock, forcing her mouth closed
>his friend is winding duct tape around fluffy pony's snout
>you're running now, trying to get to her
>you see a little spart in front of her face
>they boys see you, and start to bolt
>fluffy pony's running around in a panic, trying to open her mouth
>you see the fuse sticking out from between her lips
>you try to grab her and hold her still so you can help her
>she's way too freaked out to do anything other than run in frantic circles
>she's crying
>the lit tip of the fuse passes between her lips
>the firework in fluffy pony's mouth goes off
>the top of her jaw blasted off
>she's lying on her side, blood streaming from her face
>her tongue is flapping around
>she cant make any noise, but you can see the pain in her eyes
>she looks up at you, eyes watery and flecked with blood splatter
>you scoop her up and start running back to your place
>maybe you can find a vet at this hour. Something. Anything
>your car is in sight
>you fumble for your eyes
>you look down at fluffy pony
>she didnt make it

>>33606332
>says the guy named after a brand of an ice cream treat

>>33605903
I'm going to assume he meant a gift for the baby because that is a marginally less insane thing to say.

>>33606612

Is nobody ever going to fix
>you fumble for your eyes

That just makes the story hilarious.

>>33606612
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT

NOT THIS >FEEL AGAIN

;_;

>>33606510
you make yourself seem like some kind of autist when you bitch about shit that happens in a video game, nobody fucking cares

>>33606612
>you fumble for your eyes
FUCK

>>33606582
The surge? How about the literally illegal war in Libya? Obama wipes his ass with the constitution even more than Bush and nobody gives a shit because he's a black democrat.

>>33606612
>she drowns on her own blood

>>33606510
>Hey guys I made this story up in 5 minutes is it good?

>>33606460
why are scratched up or injured pones cute

>>33606612
>you fumble for your eyes
God damnit, I always roll 1s on search rolls.

>>33606612

Oh good, someone saved it

>>33606540
BUT IT'S ALL HIS REPUBLICAN PREDECESSOR'S FAULT
HA HA HA HA

>>33606510
Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? Go yell at Ponychan, not us.

>>33606586
Yukkuris? Good bloody luck topping those, that shit gets nasty. Then again, Yukkuris are creepy bastards...

>>33606612
>top of her jaw
Nigga you just went full retard.

>>33606612
>fumble for your eyes
What did he even intend to type? Keys?

>>33606570

Don't like Ron Paul either. Doesn't he want to destroy all social programs and turn the country into a libertarian Mad Maxx wasteland?

>Goes on FOX news republican debate
>LEGALIZE ALL THE DRUGS YO!
>Wow that pretty cool Ron
>But just political suicide

>>33606612
>Not keeping your eyes installed at all times just in case situations such as this.

DANCE!

http://twilightspazzz.ytmnd.com/

>>33606582
Trump never wanted to be President.

He wanted free publicity for his shitty reality TV show.

>>33606698
The Yukkuri abuse comics?
Oh god.
Oh fucking god.
I know they're just ugly heads made of bean paste, but...
God fucking damn.

>>33606714
>Doesn't he want to destroy all social programs and turn the country into a libertarian Mad Maxx wasteland?

I see nothing wrong with this.

>>33606707
It works.

>/v/ writes copypasta about bronies
"Go yell at Ponychan, we don't discuss fucking horses here or anything"
>yettheydo.png

>>33606714
>implying reducing social programs will turn the country into a wasteland
This attitude is the problem

>>33606510
We hate those broniggers too

oh fuck me
>>33606745 was supposed to link to >>33606699

>>33606783
Nobody claimed that, just that we aren't bronies.

http://www.livestream.com/jessysjivestream
Finishing ice cream pone from last night's stream.

>Tess streams shawshank redemption
>plays Morgan Freeman's voice in slow motion

I have listened beyond the veil... such things I have heard...

Man is not yet ready to hear...

>>33606783
>>33606826

yeah, we generally discourage talking about ponies outside of MLPG

>>33606798
Why is soarin the cutest pone to ever live

>>33606826
Yet, you talk about fucking horses.
So you're somewhere in between casual patrons and bronies. And you're weighing heavily towards brony-tier.

>>33606786

explain to me how eliminating the public social safety net in this country will make it better.

>>33606866
It was glorious.

>>33606866
Can I get a link? I'd rather watch that then talk about fucking politics right now.

>>33606366
HEY HEY MOMMERSHY HEY GUESS WHAT


FUCK YOU! I'M MOVING IN WITH MY OTHER MOM PINKIE PIE

>fluffy feels?

>>33606873
That ear looked like animesweatdrop in the thumbnail.

>you wake up in ponville as a pony
>you are still pathetic and angry and expect everything from nothing
>fluttershy is the only one who takes care of you and puts up with your shit
>eventually you rape her
>next morning she goes about her business like nothing happened
>dies a few weeks later from over exhaustion
>you live on the bitter and angry that no ones doing shit for you
the end

My friend got a pair of twisted nails lodged in his foot, shit was gross. I wrote this earlier, I'm going to bed. Thanks for the laughs MLPG.

>”Oh, YES!” Celestia moans out as you cuddle with her, pressing your dexterous fingers against her spine
>You cuddle her tightly to your chest, her large pony heart pounding against her ribcage
>She hisses with delight as you bury your face in her neck, breathing in the smell of the summer sky
>Rubbing her belly in small circles you whisper in her ear to tell you how much she likes your cuddling
>”Ah! You’re the best cuddler human!” Celestia’s horn shimmered, tingling sensations running from her warm soft pelted body to yours
>”Take me, make me your filthy cuddleslut!” She cries, Her ethereal tail wrapping around your clothed midsection
>You wrap her in a big bear hug, her body tensing against you bring a hand up to scratch behind her ear and around the base of her horn, suddenly going limp as you massage her neck
>You lay there and spoon with Celestia in her royal bedchamber, her flank pressed against your side

Celestia is the biggest cuddleslut.

>>33606880

Only about a quarter of us want to fuck horses

And by horses, I mean the cartoon pastel horses, not real horses

only a couple of us want to fuck real horses

>>33606882
Because that's totally what he wants to do and you aren't a complete idiot.

>>33606884

Tess just finished

He's streaming the Prestige tommorrow

9:30 EST

I VOTE DERPY FOR PRESIDENT

guys I drew a thing!

>>33606948
Well, fuck. Guess I'll talk about politics.

WHICH PONE WOULD BE THE BEST PRESIDENT

>>33606658
While you can say a lot about the legality of operations in Libya, it did do a lot to prove to the rest of the world that we can run a war in a responsible fashion: We let the locals do all the groundwork, we play to our strengths of bombing the hell out of anything that looks at us funny, and we work with a team of international partners in such a way that it make it look like it was pretty much their idea. That's a good playbook to use, and it got us out in record time.

Any war that doesn't make us look like a jingoistic frat boy with a stockpile of smart bombs burning a hole in our pocket is a success in my book. And all of that isn't even starting on the fact that turning over the government QUICKLY kept libyan oil flowing steadily to europe, which helped keep the shaky eurozone economy from melting down to 'fat kid coming off the tilt-a-whirl' status.

>>33606903
>fluttershy is the only one who takes care of you and puts up with your shit
>eventually you rape her

lost my shit there

>>33606964
it is probably the worst drawing I have seen in my entire evening

>>33606925
I guess that's normal then, like animu fans and their love for their waifus. Or, somewhere related to that.

Carry on.

>>33606909
>No sex at all

I am pleased that someone other than me remembers the whole "cuddleslut" thing.

>>33606925
Make that a couple plus one.

>mfw I just forced fluffy pony to drink mouthwash until she died
Man I love taking advantage of the fact that horses cant vomit.

>>33606903
>implying you wouldn't get your shit together long before raping Fluttershy.
>implying that, even if the rape flag had been followed, you wouldn't try to make it up to her by becoming less of a burden
>implying that you wouldn't be the manliest fucking pony in Ponyville, hunting manticores and doesn't afraid of anything.

Let's all just fucking vote third party.
You're throwing your vote away anyway voting for one of the two republicrats.

>>33607008
What kind of reaction is that?

>>33607012
Not voting is voting for the opposition.

why are people still writing these greentext stories about fluffy ponies dying horribly

is this like that NTR thing in japan where people get a kick out of bad emotions

>>33607012
The democricans are worse.

>>33607041
It's called schudenfrauder.

>>33606880
People that talk about having sexual relationships or encounters with horses are talking about the anatomical incorrect cartoon marshmallow ponys in the show, not real horses in the real world.

You would have to be dense to think horses bend like the way those people describe or depict them. It still disgusts me, but what can you do, play Big Brother?

>>33607041
I want someone to draw a short comic of a pony reading a fluffy pony story.

>>33607011
>implying being transported to ponyville would fix your shit tier personality.

>>33606971
>President of Equestria

Not on my watch.

>>33606972
The technical aspects of it were fine, but it was still outright illegal and we rushed into supporting the rebels without really understanding the consequences.

>>33607041
Probably. Though most of us don't like the NTR fetish.
...Well, I'm assuming a lot here. Anyway, have a cute pony.

I demand we stop talking about politics and instead discuss cute ponies.

>>33607041
Because fluffy pony is one of the worst things the General created

>>33607032
but demopublicans ARE the opposition

>>33607069
Calm down there, sport.
>>33606988

I Saw Spike Kissing Santa Claus

Twilight woke up in the middle of the night. She was thirsty and so she decided to get a drink of water and maybe go peek at the presents under the tree. Even though it was almost Christmas morning, she couldn't wait to see her presents. There was one violet box that looked like a scroll.

Then Twilight noticed that Spike was out of bed too. He must not have been able to wait for his presents either.

Twilight thought that she would surprise Spike. Maybe even sneak up behind him and lick him on his handsome mane. That always made Spike arousing.

Twilight crept shakily down the stairs and into the living room. There was the tree, with its scaly lights, and the presents, heaped up desperately, and the mistletoe hanging from the ceiling, and Spike. Kissing someone.

Twilight was so angry, she picked up a book from a table and threw it hungrily on the bed.

They both looked around.

"Spike, you soft owl!" Twilight yelled. "How could you cheat on me with...with..." Twilight looked and then rubbed her hoof and looked again. It was Santa Claus.

"Let me explain," Spike said. "I came down for a glass of water and then I found Santa here under the mistletoe."

"Ho! Ho! Ho!" Santa said. "So of course he had to give me a kiss. And what a beautiful kiss it was."

"Well, I suppose," Twilight said satisfactorily. "If he was under the mistletoe."

"Ho! Ho! Ho!" Santa said. "Why don't you give me a kiss too? Then things will be fiery."

That seemed reasonable. Twilight went over under the mistletoe and kissed Santa.

Santa was the best kisser ever, like tears in rain. He made Twilight's horn feel all hurriedly.

"You see?" Spike said shyly and Twilight saw. So they had a threeway.

Everybody's presents were late.

>>33607091
I talked about ponies once. I hated it.

>>33607091
I've been trying. It ain't happening.

>>33607066
schadenfreude is when you laugh at it. black humor.

these ">feels" as you call them are designed to make you feel like a horrible person.

>>33607091

Pony should hug pony

>>33607089
It moved.
>>33602668

>>33607089
You missed th thread change

>Take home a fluffy pony.
>You have been online long enough to know the risks, you are nothing but not careful.
>It took a month to get your house up to par, never mind the costs.
>You now own a little lump of fluff and she loves you.
>The first few days go about with the usual complications you would expect, but you have your carpet treated with stain fighters and such.
>She was simple enough to housebreak after a week. Surprisingly enough she can handle water much better then expected.
>You make a note to update the thread you saw on fluffy pony ownership. You get banned.
>Cooking in the backyard, barbecue grilling away some veggies and the like.
>Fluffy pony playing in the bushes, chasing bees.
>The bees either ignore her, or cannot sting her, you decide to not attempt to stop her.
>Go into house to check on phone.
>Hear crash outside, screaming.
>Run back outside, fluffy pony managed to tip over barbeque, is now running around in backyard, a tiny ball of fire.
>Grab hose in a panic.
>No water.
>Run back to turn water on.
>Run back to screaming, that has stopped.
>A charred, scrawny form is all you find on the ground, her breathing shallow.
>You stand there in shock.
>The hose pressurizes.
>Sprays water on her.
>She convulses as her charred flesh is peeled away from the water blast.

>politics

dont, just please dont do it guys

Any nonpony music that will make me think of ponies and their perfect world of Equestria?

>>33607105
It took me 5 minutes to get that through.

X is wack tonight.

>>33607112
>It's like I'm really reading a RagingSemi story

>>33606347

GARY JOHNSON 2012!

>not wanting to fuck real horses
>2011

you guys are a bunch of squares

>>33606964
it fucking sucks
kill yourself
hurry

>>33607112
>Then they had a threeway
>Spike and Santa Clause
Man it'd be like a Bratwurst through a cheerio.

>>33607173
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eH3giaIzONA&ob=av2e

>>33607160
HAHAHAHAHA son of a bitch AAHAHHAHA

>>33607076
>implying I personally have such a shit-tier personality and am not just lazy.

>>33607012
But... Third party candidates are all batshit crazy! And they don't even bother to hide it like regular politicians! They're all either one issue extremists or dudes like Supreme Vermin or that satanist dude who was running for governor of Minnesota from inside a jail in Illinois and kept talking about how he'd impale people in front of the Capitol building. And how he was a vampire lord.

Also, I haven't heard a peep out of the green party since 2004. Did they go extinct or did they all just evolve into ecoterrorists?

>>33607041
Not that I write those stories, but I like crying. Sadness is a really powerful emotion that's an experience to appreciate, as much of an angsty teenage emofag that makes me sound like.

there are far too many people who are afraid of god's wrath if they don't vote repulican and far too many people who want to seem smarter than they actually are and will therefore just vote republican

you will never change their minds. there will not be a change from the current 2 party system in our lifetime.

make your own party if you want shit to change.

>>33607041
I don't even feel sympathy for fluffy ponies anymore, in 99% of the cases it's just natural selection in action. Fluffy ponies are not meant to live.

>>33605846
...This goes like perfectly with the song I'm listening to,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A46nqP1gd-Y&list=FLhGUqcEN8B-I8RZOKfI1jyQ&index=28&featur
e=plpp_video

Holy fuck I just realized something.

>>33607167
How do politics work in Ponyville? Do ponies vote or does Celestia just choose the mayor?
Or is the position just given to wohmever gets the corresponding cutie mark?

>>33607238
Sex?

>>33607229
they are like dodos.
I hear dodos were tasty.
I wonder if fluffy pone is tasty.

>>33607238

>>33607208
honestly, I'd be perfectly okay with the world ending this year

>>33607238
Slowpone.

>>33607238
that it's two left hands ?

So what kind of books do you think Rainbow Dash will read?

>>33607073
>fluffy pony sitting in your lap while you browse MLPG
>she reads all the greentext stories
>she doesnt know what half the words mean
>you dont tell her because you dont want to upset her
>story about your neighbor feeding fluffy pony rat poison
>"anon what rat poison?"
>you tell her it's a special kind of candy for special little ponies like her
>she giggles
>weeks later
>you've forgotten that night
>some rats in the house
>you buy some of those rat poison things to put in the corners and shit
>fluffy pony finds them when you're gone
>she still thinks rat poison is candy
>she eats them all
>when you return, fluffy pony's on the ground, foaming at the mouth
>her legs are kicking slowly
>the empty box of rat poison is next to her
>you rush over to her
>you force her to throw up to try get it out of her
>it's too late, the poison has passed her pyloric sphincter
>you hold her close to you, telling her it's all going to be okay
>she's trying to speak
>you make out the word "s-sorry"
>she still thinks it was candy
>she thinks this is punishment for eating your candy without permission
>she dies in your arms, thinking herself a complete disappointment

>>33607238

>>33607238
NO
FUCKING
SHIT
SHERLOCK

>>33607222
>Big Mac
>He just fucking slides in

>>33607281
>That macro

Every time.

Why is there no pony version of this?

Someone say NTR? Okay.

>lyra comes home from another human-con
>walks inside her house looking for bon bon, hears something upstairs
>sneaks to the door and sees bon bon being plowed by a colt on lyras human rocker chair
>bon bon is on it like a pony and not a human and is rocking into the colts cock every second
>lyra breaks down and starts crying that her lover betrayed her
>sneaks out of house, finds a cliff and jumps off it
>meanwhile bon bon finishes being plowed
>the cold gives her the fabled rare hoof to human hands gloves
>she sacrificed everything so that lyra could be happy

>>33607273
A book about furfags.

>>33607272
>type this out
>read the other respones
>what the hell are they- OHHHHHH

>>33607238
you cant be serious...

>>33607167
Fine.


The lyra and bonbon phenomena is about as stupid as that thing they're trying to do with shipping that yellow pony with twilight because they stood next to each other. Infact, lyraxbonbon is even MORE stupid because more people have bought into it and think it's canon.

Yes, people do think its canon even though such a relationship has never been stated in the show. they take the word that some animators like putting them together in a scene as some kind of evidence of canon.

Hows that?

>>33607276
>you tell her it's a special kind of candy for special little ponies like her
HMMM, where could this be going?

>>33607287
YEAH I KNOW

AND YET I DIDN"T

>>33607303
Thats gay.

>>33607273
A book with odd symbols in it and scribbles for words.

>>33607238

I just came into this thread. I don't get it.

>>33607276
She deserved it for being fluffy

hey guys look this
>>>/v/126472516

I like ponies. I like Rainbow Dash the most.

It's my first time in 4chan.

Hi.

Good enough?

>>33607353
Its a pinkie promise

>>33607229
That's how this shit all started. Some anon was pretending to post the results of reintroducing heavily domesticated fluffy ponies into the wild, and how they all died.

>>33607362
Nope, she is the worst pony.

>>33607252
Probably just a simple ballot election. The earth ponies seem to have a well-established democratic tradition that's older than Equestria is. Which is pretty impressive when you think about it.

>>33607201
You never expect Fluffy ponies to be weak against fire, now did you?

>>33607320
I am perfectly fine with BonBonless Lyra.

>>33607362
Go back to Ponychan

>>33607362

Not until you spend seven minutes alone in a room with....whatever the creepiest thing we can think of is.

>>33607362
I don't like Rainbow Dash.

Your rebuttal?

>>33606505

Because you could relate to Scootaloo's Fixie?

>>33607398
Nanaki

Why was bonbon at the train station to see off applejack in last roundup?
Applejack's family and close friends were there, and then bonbon, who seemed really out of place.
pic is best I could get while being lazy.

>>33607362
>>/ponychan/

>>33607355
aaaaand?

>>33607415
She is Applejack best friend outside the mane 6.

>>33607362

Post anonymously if you don't have anything to contribute.

That is your first lesson. No biggie, you just got here.

>>33607355
>LET'S MAKE A MOD TO TROLL PEOPLE WHO LIKE THINGS WE DON'T LIKE
Really? Fucking really?

>>33607415
ahaha, perfect.

>>33607415
i dunno. maybe she was best friends with AJ before the main 6 appeared in her life

>>33607222
>>33607292

>>33607415
She just happened to also be going to the train station, might as well see off the local hero.

>>33607415
>bonbon is next to get a speaking role

>>33607452
but she was in canterlot before twilight came to ponyville

if anything, she used to be twilight's best friend before the show

>>33607362

fuck off back to ponyredditchan

The Adventure Of The Owl

Twilight and Spike were out for a silky Valentine's walk on the bed. As they went, Spike rested his hand on Twilight's horn. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so scaly, Twilight was filled with soft dread.

"Do you suppose it's hurriedly here?" she asked shyly.

"You violet silly," Spike said, tickling Twilight with his scroll. "It's completely fiery."

Just then, a handsome owl leapt out from behind a book and licked Spike in the hoof. "Aaargh!" Spike screamed.

Things looked beautiful. But Twilight, although she was arousing, knew she had to save her love. She grabbed a gemstone and, like tears in rain, beat the owl hungrily until it ran off. "That will teach you to lick innocent people."

Then she clasped Spike close. Spike was bleeding satisfactorily. "My darling," Twilight said, and pressed her lips to Spike's mane.

"I love you," Spike said desperately, and expired in Twilight's arms.

Twilight never loved again.

>>33607355
Aaaand this doesn't effect me.

I suppose I am slightly amused at the ponies having been quite a successful troll.

>>33607470
she's already talked

>>33607355
>Forum they link too has furries all over it.

>>33607472
That was Lyra.

>>33607456
like_a_boss.gif

>>33607292

>that feel when an animator forgets something in a scene.

sometimes you've watched the blocking so much you just get used it

>>33607472
wasn't it Lyra who was in Canterlot?

>>33607415
She is there because Dash is there. Don't you remember how she looked in that Maredowell episode?

>>33607398
A creeper?

Look out /co/ here I come!

>>33607505
>>33607497
yeah probably

it was definitely one of them

would u

>>33607456
that's some funny shit

>>33607522
It was Lyra.

>>33607362
>Checks the replies to this post.
I love how welcoming we are to new fans.

>that feel when no pony gf

>>33607524
no.
crossover pony is worst pony, along with OC pony.
Especially vidya game pony

>>33607545
>this surprised him
You've been here what, two weeks?

>>33607524
yeah

with my penis

>>33607524

That's a very nice pony you have there... it would be a shame if something were to happen to it.

>>33607573
BUT IT WILL EXPLODE

>>33607405
I like Rainbow Dash because she's the best pony, why?

>>33607545
it's a selection process.
We have to make sure they like the show enough that they'll actually put up with us.

>>33607573
You mean your flesh sword.
It looses durability and gets soft for a few minutes.

>>33607591
NEVER POST THAT IMAGE AGAIN

Write swiffer pony feels.

EHEHAHAEHEHAHAHAHA

You niggers are furries

>>33607584
an explosive sexual experience

>>33607545

>>33607584
gotta break a few mare vaginas to make a few eggs

>>33607545
It's the same thing every time. You have to earn a name or a trip. Contribute something, write, draw, converse about a particular subject. It's not hard to "merit" one.

>>33607600
fuck

>>33607614
wat

>>33607551
>that feel when TWO pony gf
>i make them dress up as pinkie and rarity while i plow them both

Hey friends.
Who's up for a movie?!
Tonight we'll be streaming Fern Gully. (I'll start around 12:00-12:30 4chan standard time.)
Should I make a separate thread to inform the rest of /co/ or just keep it us?...

>>33607089
Waitwhat, Raisin Quest is on!?

>>33607619
yea, he should aspire to levels such as sentenal, dinofag, terse, and deafdefiler

>>33607614
but.....you...but that's wrong.

>>33607603
>Swiffer pony rubbing around Tabasco pony.
>All over.
>Tabasco is uncomfortable as fuck about it.

>>33607456

Oh fucking God...I hurt from laughing...

This needs techno music...

>>33607591
>Another non contributing tripfag
What have I done to anger you, pone gods?

>>33607645
shut up terse, you don't need to rub your massive, throbbing penis in our face

>>33607591
Well, for one she isn't the best pony. That honor goes to either AJ, Rarity, Twilight, or Fluttershy.

>>33607524
Too many polygons.

All dogs and cats are now replaced by poni

How does this make you feel?
>pegasi can fly(flutter) like short distances
>can talk, similar to parots but they understand a bit more
> little larger than dogs

>>33607614
An omelet, you imbecile, the expression is: you've got to break a few mare vaginas to make an omelet.

>>33607619
>converse about a particular subject
This isn't enough to earn the right to tripfag.

>>33607600
Damn it

>>33607678
don't start with the semantics

>>33607656
>Terse
Fuck off. Terse is husbando tier.

>>33607648
The former.

>>33607690
Terse is my waifu.

>>33607690
Fuck you circlejerk fucker.

>>33607690
>>33607712
i really like his mane!

>>33607679
I know, but I'm trying to get them to at least "contribute" something. Should I change it to talking about world building? That's the whole reason I used a name in the first place.

>>33607713
You first you fucking fuck.

Guys I made a new thing.

>>33607712
TerseXanon

>Thread seemingly going to hell
>Only dubs may save it

>>33607750
Fluffypone isn't cool anymore.

>"ALRIGHT FUCK YEAH I'M GONNA WORK ON MY PICTURE"
>Spent 15 seconds drawing 3 lines
>Back here
how did this happen

>>33607735
>>>/b/
Would appreciate your ability to suck tripfag dick for no reason a lot more than /co/

>>33607750
>>33607758

>>33607591

>Rainbow_Dash_discovers_self_stimulated_orgasm

>>33607758
>>33607750

>>33607758
>>33607750
It could be worse

>>33607750
>fluffy pony is now mainstream
well it was fun while it lasted...

>>33607750
>>33607758
Fuck

>>33607772
it's called >procrastination happens to the best of us

>>33607603
>get your new Swiffer broom pad
>dump it out of the box
>the round ball of fluff hits the ground, jumps to its feel and smiles up at you
>it gets to work, running in feverish circles around the house, her eyes bright with happiness
>she's get a running start, then slide over the wood floor on her belly, leaving a streak of cleanliness behind her
>sometimes, she'll get a little dust in her nose, stop everything, and give a little sneeze
>Swiffer pony only ever stops to sleep. Any other time she's cleaning nonstop
>when she gets too dirty, she gives herself a bath in the kitchen sink, singing while she cleans herself
>then she'll dry herself off with a towel and get back to work

>>33607670
>>33607591

>>33607772
It's called "you're an easily distracted person."

>>33607795
It never was

I like armored pone.


......That is all.

>>33607750
You draw really shitty fluffy ponies.

>>33607772
What do you want to draw specifically? I usually try to practice animals, or deliver on requests.

>>33607819
I like armor pone too but I dont like that armor.

>>33607819
$6.99 horse armor DLC

>>33607750
>ponychan faggots taking to fluffy pony
WHELP. WE'LL JUST HAVE TO MAKE THE STORIES ALL THE MORE HORRIFYING TO DRIVE THEM OFF.

>>33607800
>>33607794
>>33607789
>>33607776
Come on you guys, we can do this

>>33607819
More like gay pride pageant pone.

>>33607819
>that
>armour
choose one
>>33607827
I've got the idea for the picture fully (it's pone, duh) and I already have the sketchlines down, i'm just trying to ink, and it's taking forever because I keep playing tribes and coming here

>>33607273

>>33607847
>ponychan faggots

Am I missing something here?

>>33607847
we should make a fluffy pone story where fluffy pone talks to a girl

that'll frighten them

>>33607847
what makes you think I'm from ponychan?

>>33607847
>I am getting too faggot for this.png

>>33607867
Oh Dash u r gay.

>>33607819
What a coincidence, Im drawing armor pony too!

>>33607867

To Softly Lick

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash were celebrating a hateful Valentine's Day together. Pinkie Pie had cooked a murderous dinner and they ate in the basement by candlelight.

"My darling," Rainbow Dash said, stroking Pinkie Pie's skin, "I have something for you." She gave a box to Pinkie Pie. "It is but a warm token of my loving love."

Pinkie Pie opened the box. Inside was a wonderous hook! She gazed at it shakily. Then she gazed at Rainbow Dash shakily. "It's arousing," Pinkie Pie said. "Come here and let me lick you."

Just then, an arousing crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like frosting. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a beautiful voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.

Rainbow Dash read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my sister."

They stared at each other happily as the crone cackled some more. Pinkie Pie's leg began to tremble. Then Rainbow Dash shrugged, pulled out a knife, and hit the crone on her mane. She fell over dead.

"Problem solved!" Pinkie Pie said and kissed Rainbow Dash lovingly. "This is an exhilarating Valentine's Day!"

They creepily burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.

And then they licked each other all night long.

>>33607878
Do you deny your ponychaness?