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PonyQuest™ 2: Electric Boogaloo: The Reunion
!!cJ4MGVqvOKw 10/14/11(Fri)19:48 No. 30568339 >>30568087 Shakily rising to your feet, as you brush off the last vestiges of drunkenness after another night spent alone and unloved, oh god, you survey the world around you. It seems you are in the middle of a field! The long grasses swaying in the wind are dotted with the occasional patch of delicious-looking golden corn, and in the distance, past the thick treeline, you can see the rising pillar of some sort of chimney. It's smoking quite heavily, a viscous black smog that is beginning to drift in your direction, but you figure it's not pressing right now. Despite being an environmentalist, you need to put yourself and your situation first!>>30568155 Suddenly, you find yourself gripped in the throes of a most dire regret. Nothing can fix the travesty that is your life now, and in finally understanding so, you decide to end it. Biting down on your tongue as hard as you can, you watch your empty and pointless life flash before your eyes, finally leaving the world with no regrets. Ouch! That accomplished fuck all save pain and a red-raw tongue. You curse yourself for your complete stupidity.>>30568143 The narrator, whose omniscient narration is both entirely neutral and awesome, chooses not to take offense. He does, however, point out that you are, without a doubt, a chump, as long as he is in control. Then he laughs a mocking laugh that makes you feel bad. It reminds you of your childhood. Choosing not to go down that road, you take inventory, prioritising the most important things. The two pony figurines are brand new Revoltech on-model versions of Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie, your two favourite ponies, but you also have more at home, albeit they are useless to you. The world around you is scary and unknown. Screaming would not help with your tongue blistering. Also, the nerve! Like you'd ever wear that unironically. No, today you're wearing your aviators and Pinkamena shirt, printed straight from CT's tumblr. It's fab.